


High School Confidential

by D_Genesis



Category: Naruto
Genre: Adult Situations, Alternate Universe - High School, Drama, Explicit Language, F/M, Het, Humor, M/M, SasuNaru - Freeform, Slash, Suggestive Dialogue, Violence, bottom Naruto, top Sasuke
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-07
Updated: 2014-02-07
Packaged: 2018-01-11 11:57:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 21,662
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1172792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/D_Genesis/pseuds/D_Genesis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sasuke is every females’ dream; tall, dark and handsome—too bad for them he’s gay. Then there is Naruto; every gay guys walking wet dream, who happens to be straight. Although Sasuke’s not convinced. Not at all. </p><p>  <strong>SasuNaru</strong></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Bastard

**This story is cross-posted on FF.Net** **  
**

**Warnings:** AU **.** Yes. _Another_ highschool fic—Though I’m hoping for _some_ originality. Some het. **Slash** (meaning boy with boy in romantic and/or sexual relations.) **Orochimaru** _(who **isn’t** a complete freak)_ Language that may offend. Violence. Adult situations. Suggestive dialogue and _maybe_ **sexual content**. Though I might pass on the last, generally because I wanted to write something funny and light, not too sexually based. Aren’t there enough of those on here? Anyway. **Un’beta’d!**  
 ** _I have warned you_**. If you are uncomfortable with **any** of this, then turn back now.  
 **Disclaimer:** This is a work of fanfiction, written purely to entertain myself and (hopefully) whoever else stumbles upon this and finds it amusing.  
 **Main pairings,** **_Top/Bottom:_** **_Eventual_** Sasuke/Naruto.  
 **One-sided/Implied/Side pairings:** Some Naruto/Sakura and onesided Sasuke/Sakura. _almost_ every guy student/Naruto.

 

* * *

High school Confidential

 

* * *

**I**

**Bastard**

サスケxナルト

_Sasuke-kun? What isn’t to like about him? He’s so handsome and talented and **smart**. He’s the school president and the captain of the basketball team. I don’t know anyone who can match him in anything. He’s the best!_

_But if I had to chose someone else... I’d say the new boy. He’s a **natural** blonde! Most of the other girl’s think he’s too pretty. They’re just jealous of his looks, I mean blue-eyed blonde? Though I agree he can be sort of air-headed. And he’s kinda loud. But he’s still a great guy and he’s fun to be around. In fact, I’ve changed my mind. _

_If I were to choose between Sasuke-kun and Naruto-kun; it’d definitely be Naruto-kun._

サスケxナルト

The day was turning out to be a rather bright one. Birds wheeled overhead, singing as they went about their daily business in the concrete and glass forests with bright neon signs and screens that made up the majority of Tokyo city. Even the temperature had lifted to something that closer resembled the heat of the summer months rather than the beginnings of spring. All in all, the day was turning out to be a good one.

Oh, what the hell was he thinking? The day was shitty. That irritable and continual _RIIIIIING_ stated— “Oh, screw it all—” that he was late. _Again_. For the _fourth_ time that week. Iruka-sensei was going to _slaughter_ him. Then gut him and dance around in his blood using his intestines as some bizarre source of entertainment.

 _Heh,_ that was a bit morbid. Even for him.

Bounding from his bed with the energy that a teen of his age shouldn’t naturally possess so early in the morning—it was half past seven, so said his alarm but that’s considered early in any _normal_ teen’s mind. Totally besides the point, but anyway—Naruto dashed to his bathroom for a quick shower, whilst simultaneously washing his teeth _and_ brushing his unruly golden tresses. A difficult feat while it still had shampoo that needed to be washed out.

 _If that’s not talent,_ he thought spitting the excess froth and toothpaste down the shower drain, _then I don’t know what is._

Drying himself once all the soap residue was washed from his pale-gold body, he hurriedly dressed in his school uniform. The trousers were black and a little bigger than regulation dictated but hey, that was fine by him and gave him the excuse to wear a belt. It also made his legs look a little bigger than what they _really_ were. A plus on any given day. The black school blazer fit easily over his charcoal coloured jersey, where the collar of a plain white shirt peeked out. The school tie was black with diagonal stripes of silver.

All in all _very boring_.

Sometimes he wondered if it would hurt anyone to add a little colour to the school uniforms instead of making them so... so, well black and white. Then again, this was a school where they expected you to wear their uniform to their specific requirements, use the standard book bags, wear the regular issue school shoes— _black, shiny monstrosities_ —that Naruto _refused_ outright to wear and opted for a pair of hightops instead.

The girls uniform wasn’t much different varying only in the black, charcoal, grey and white plaid skirt with socks.

Shockingly enough, they had a _choice_ in what kind of socks. So long as they were either black or white. But still, there was a choice. Naruto blamed it on the old principal who chose the school uniform.

 _I bet he was a complete pervert_ , the blonde grumbled inwardly. _I mean, who dictates what colour a girl’s underwear are meant to be? And what kind of material?_

That’s right. The girls had to wear white cotton underwear. Talk about power freak. Who does that? Seriously.

Casting his eye around his messy bedroom; the bed unmade— _like yesterday_ —resting near the French sliding doors that lead to a small balcony; a pile of unwashed clothing pushed to the opposite corner of his room; his wardrobe door open wide, like a gaping mouth needing to be fed and the trash spilling from the rubbish bin right next to it. He’d have to clean up. Tonight. Maybe. If he could be bothered.

As for breakfast...

“Looks like I’ll have to skip,” he muttered in some annoyance, some longing but mostly resignation. Yes, definitely a shitty start to a shitty day. His clock now read ten past eight.

Maybe if he was fast enough, he could grab something from that little café he’d passed the other day? Now that was an idea. Snatching up his bag, he donned his sneakers and flew out the door with a muttered, “I’m heading out.”‘

No one answered.

No one ever did and he was used to the stifling silences now. House keys jingled as he bounded down the stairs, through the lobby of the complex—an absent wave thrown at the doorman—and out onto the sidewalk.

This _wasn’t_ what he’d had in mind when he’d transferred into the school.

It was his first year—his first _week_ damn it—and already most of the teachers knew him by face. _By voice_. By the fact he was tardy and loud and had started that riot down in cafeteria... Which was—by the way, _totally_ —not his fault. Someone had just taken a sudden dislike to him. He thought it might have been that total babe Sakura-chan’s friend... but he couldn’t be sure.

Well _someone_ had taken a dislike to him and shoved him, or rather _tried_ to shove him. The result? Someone else being shoved in his stead, which knocked into yet _another_ person who’s tray—bearing a bowl of miso, _ouch_ —had tipped and spilled _all over_ some completely innocent bystander. Said bystander countered with _wasabi_. Yes, wasabi.

Naruto pitied whoever got _that_ in their eyes. Stuff burned like a... um, _yeah_.

Cue food fight.

It involved practically everyone in the room and miraculously, Naruto managed to escape the onslaught of flying edibles _unscathed_ while practically all other beings in the vicinity were cloaked in foodstuffs. And still, the newbie was pegged with the blame. Typical. So freaking typical. The jerks. But not Sakura-chan. _Never_ Sakura-chan.

She was one of the few people he had talked to. Strangely enough, she was one of the only girls that genuinely seemed to like him. All the other friends he made were guys. A mismatched group that seemed to have nothing in common.

 _Wonder how Kiba went with that job interview last night_ , the blonde pondered his scruffy looking brunet friend. The boy appeared more feral than Naruto had as a small child. Complete with red war paint marring both of his tanned cheeks.

Having a part-time job was generally frowned upon in highschool due to the hectic work load and pressure to get into good universities but Kiba had claimed he needed the extra cash for his dog, Akamaru. Strange. Naruto hadn’t thought owning a pet could be so expensive. Was Kiba’s dog the size of a horse or something?

Glancing up from his musings, Naruto caught the pedestrian light blinking green; signalling he could cross the road and did so. He carried on down the road and crossed through the local park.

At this rate, he’d only be maybe fifteen minutes late to home room. That was fine since his home room teacher was also notorious for his late arrivals, however the problem lay in the fact that they locked the gates at half past eight. Though Naruto had a way around this barrier. Or rather, _over_. A daunting task, given the height of the fence and the savage looking spikes that capped it.

 _Like little spears_ , Naruto reflected with a grimace and took another step. Right out into the road.

_HONK!_

And immediately snapped out of his trance at the sound of rubber tearing and gripping at asphalt and the harsh blear of a car that seemed to speeding towar—

_Argh. Hellooo chrome grills._

Naruto was almost sure he saw his fickle life flash across his vision. Then again, it may have been the blinding silver reflecting the sun directly into his eyes.

Well, what do you know? He opened his eyes slowly—having squeezed them shut at realising his oh so traumatic predicament—to find a very irate looking man, sitting behind his steering wheel of a very glossy looking sports car.

Apparently Naruto had tried crossing the road without looking. Retake. A _busy, traffic riddled_ road, without looking. And holy shit he was _still alive_. All praise the wonderful, beautiful, _perfect_ gods for being kind enough to watch his thoughtless, retarded arse and save him from certain doom. Namely being that of road kill... Yes.

“What was that?” Demanded the livid looking man, also sounding really quite well... _livid_. He was also shit loads taller than Naruto who was suddenly cursing his flawed genetics as the man stepped out of his car, ignoring the curious stares both were garnering.

 _Maybe this guy has something else mixed in a well?_ Naruto considered, taking in the other’s somewhat built form and again, cursed both his mother and father for being on the rather slim side. _He_ was the one who had a part-German, part-French bloodline mixed with his Japanese heritage and yet this guy was almost a full head taller.

The guy’s face was pasty—which answered nothing of the race debate since most Japanese were pale, anyway—though the structure of his face wasn’t typically Japanese and the slant of his eyes was slightly off but both his eyes and hair was dark. _Eurasian?_

“I asked you a question, moron.”

 _There was a question?_ It was then that Naruto spotted the emblem on the man’s blazer and felt shock surge through him for about a second and a half. “You go to Konoha Gakuen?” The question wasn’t necessary, the emblem was enough proof. Ha! Apparently he wasn’t hated. “Great. You can give me a ride,” he had already walked around the car and leapt into the passenger’s seat.

The man— _no, boy—_ glared at him. Naruto stared back. What the hell was up with this guy’s hair? All girly in the front and... _plain fucked up at the back_.

“Get out of my car,” the other teen snapped, throwing his door open and looming. His shadow fell over Naruto, blocking the glare from the sun. It was most unwelcome. Inside the car was freezing.

“Look,” Naruto thought to point out. Noticing the A.C was turned on he flipped it off, earning himself a fresh glare. “You almost ran me over, then didn’t even bother to ask if I was alright. The least you could do is give me a lift to school. Since we both go there and we’re already late.”

The boy blinked, swore under his breath, jumped into the car and started it up. “Just put your belt on,” the raven-haired teen grunted, lowly. “I’m not being held responsible for your death if we stop suddenly and you’re thrown from my car.”

Sounded fair enough, even if Naruto rather disliked the guy’s overbearing persona. “Deal.” The blonde pulled the seat belt around his middle and clicked it into place. “I’m guessing you’re a third year, huh?”

“Hn.”

Azure eyes narrowed in contemplation before giving up. Thinking wasn’t exactly his forte. Questions, now that was another thing. He peered over at his silent and somewhat broody driver. “Is that a _yes_ ,” he asked. “Or a _no_?”

Said driver developed a slight eye twitch.”It’s a mind your own damn business. Now shut up.”

“Heh,” the blonde muttered, golden brows furrowed and mouth turned into an unhappy pout. Well, if the bastard wasn’t going to talk then he’d do all the talking for them! Sounded like a plan. “I’m a second year,” he declared. “Just started on Tuesday. I sorta tend to move around a lot, so I’m not used to attending a normal school but decided maybe I should settle for my final years, y’know?”

He glanced over at his dark-haired driver again. The boy didn’t appear to be listening.

“So yeah,” Naruto shrugged, feeling a little disheartened. Usually it wasn’t that hard to get someone talking to him. _Maybe the bastard’s part rock?_ “I came here, but so far my week hasn’t been all that great. I’ve been late every single day so far. Was blamed for a riot in the cafeteria—”

“That was you?”

Naruto was surprised at the question but winced at the harshness of the sound. “It _wasn’t_ me,” he denied, shifting uneasily in his leather seat. Leather, seriously? In summer it blistered and stuck to your rear and in winter it was likely to give you piles... “I was _blamed_. Or did you miss that part?”

Silence.

 _Typical_ , Naruto scoffed inwardly. _Silence when **I** ask the question. Bastard. _ “What is your name, anyway? I can’t just keep calling you bastard.” _Oh, oops. Did I say that out loud?_

The other boy glared over at him and the blonde sank—just a bit—into his seat.

_Apparently I did._

“You really lend credence to the whole blondes are dumb stereotype.”

Naruto’s head snapped around. “What?” He bit out.

The bastard had the audacity to smirk, though his eyes were still focused on the road. “You heard me,” he replied. “In fact, I believe the blondes from the stereotype are smarter than you. Since you apparently lack the ability to follow a simple command or even track a conversation.”

“Ever thought that maybe, I just don’t like following your orders, dickwad?” Naruto threw back, heatedly.

The smirk immediately dropped from the other’s face as a scowl surfaced instead. Then he turned the A.C back on and fixed an irritated glare on the blonde, whose hand had risen of its own accord to turn the cooling system back off. The look dared Naruto to go against him and despite being of the rebellious sort, the younger boy wasn’t sure how far the other’s patience actually extended and decided against it.

An awkward silence ensued.

“Sooo,” Naruto began and definitely _didn’t_ flinch when his driver’s scowl turned down right murderous. He shifted a little further away from the overwhelming—shut up and die—vibes that the other was broadcasting. “Gonna tell me your name anytime soon?”

Silence.

_Again._

Huffing, Naruto crossed lean arms over his equally lean chest and glanced out the window. This was just plain awkward and irritating. Never in his life had he stumbled upon an individual that was suffering such a severe case of Bastard-ese. It had to be of the terminal kind. Gods, he could only imagine how difficult it would be trying to locate and retrieve the silver spoon that was so obviously lodged up the older boy’s ars—

“I’ll make you a deal.”

Azure eyes flickered to the boy driving, startled from his reverie. Then said eyes narrowed in suspicion. _A deal? What kind of deal?_ He hadn’t been too willing to talk before, so why make a deal?

It was about that time that something in the sixteen year-old grew uneasy. What if this guy actually had family in the yakuza, and was just waiting until he was older to join? What if he was about to use Naruto as a drug mule? No, no maybe he was about to take the blonde for his own depraved purposes?

Naruto swallowed. Dread rising in his stomach at the very prospect. _I’m too young to become someone’s cleaner and cook_. It dawned on him then that there were far worse fates than to end up someone’s house cleaner. Like ending up _in_ the products of said house cleaner.

“Are you listening?” The dark-haired boy growled.

The blonde wasn’t really. Well, not after the deal part of his speech. Which was kind of obvious with the blank look within his deep blue eyes. “What kind of deal?” He asked warily.

The other must have heard the guarded quality to his words because he spared the blonde a brief, slightly angry glance. “I’m not going to do anything to you, idiot.” He paused and then reconsidered his words. “Unless I’m really angry.”

“I knew it!” The blonde burst out, index finger thrust accusingly at his driver. “You’re going to sell my body off to the highest bidder, aren’t you? So I’m made into cleaning products!”

This time the look the dark-haired senior spared him was bewildered and of the, ‘what the hell?’ quality. “No,” he replied, evenly. “Though, if that was my intention it would be your own fault. You don’t just get into a car with a stranger. Even if he _does_ apparently go to the same school that you do.”

Oh. So he wasn’t about to be made into Kao starch spray. _Good to know_. “So, what’s your deal then?”

“I’ll tell you my name.”

At this, Naruto perked up in his seat. Interest evident in his clear blue eyes and smile gradually forming on his face. He ignored the horrible squeaking slid of the leather seat beneath him. “That’s grea—”

“But,” the other interrupted, still facing the road. Heh. He drove one-handed. “Only when we get to school. _If_ you stay quiet.”

Somehow Naruto felt as though there was a piece of candy being dangled in front of his nose and he’d been told he could have it. But only if he ate his vegetables first. Despite this, Naruto decided it was achievable. It couldn’t be that hard, right? They were almost at school now.

“That’s it?”

His driver nodded in agreement. “That’s it.

“Okay,” the blonde exclaimed, brightly. He’d win this. No problem. All he had to do was think about something else. Like his pain in the arse homeroom teacher who was a not so closet pervert. The man was _always_ late. Without fail and usually had his head buried in a book. One Naruto highly suspected wasn’t intended for an audience under the age of eighteen. Or even the faint of heart.

He opened his mouth to ask the other boy about Kakashi then snapped it shut. The click of teeth audible in the too quiet car.

Okay. So maybe this would be a little harder than he’d thought. So instead he peered out the window and watched as buildings flashed by as he gnawed at his nails. They acted as a poor substitute for breakfast but maybe he could find a vending machine before heading to his homeroom. His nails could tied him over until then.

It wasn’t until the car stopped moving and turned off that he realised they had reached their destination. _Before_ the school gates were closed.

He blinked then grinned and instantly unbuckled his belt before he shot out of the car and into the sunlight. The warmth danced along his back and sunk into his skin. He sighed contentedly but snapped out of it as he heard the car lock with a beep.

The other boy was already walking away.

“Hey!” Naruto called out, disheartened and feeling largely put out. Voice carrying easily over the practically empty student parking lot. Wow, was he really that loud? He’d never really noticed it before. _Hmm_. “You said you’d tell me your name if I kept quiet!”

The dark haired boy paused, then shot a look over his shoulder. “I lied.”

Then he was turning away again and all Naruto could do was stare and curse the jerk to kingdom come. _Fine. If he doesn’t want to give me his name I’ll just dub him The Bastard and leave it at that._

Satisfied with this, he ran to his homeroom. School bag bouncing awkwardly over his shoulder as he threw open the door. At least he’d beat his teacher, Kakashi to—

“Hello Naruto-kun.”

The man—who was notorious for being late—was already seated at his desk, nose buried in a green book of dubious content. The blonde froze on the spot, eyes wide before he forced a nervous grin. “Morning Kakashi-sensei!”

Maybe the gods _did_ hate him after all.

* * *

I'm slowly going to move most of my stories here from FF.net.

 


	2. Rival

* * *

**II**

**Rival**

サスケxナルト

_Uzumaki? Yeah, I know him. He’s nothing but a trouble maker and attention seeker._

_I heard he was kicked out of some kind of... correctional school overseas. Usually I’m not one to listen to such rubbish, but I totally believe it! Have you seen his body under all that oversized clothing? All tall and slim and toned and... drool worthy. Almost like a **very** svelte athlete._

_Hey, don’t look at me like that! I caught him shirtless the other day, when he was just going into the boy’s changing rooms. I wasn’t peeking. Or anything! Besides, I wasn’t the only one who noticed. I saw some of the guys in my class looked shocked that the girly-faced boy possessed such a body. And anyway, Sasuke-kun’s is much hotter. And taller. And his face doesn’t look like it would break if he got into anything beyond a shoving match._

_Stupid Uzumaki!_

サスケxナルト

There was a muffin floating in front of his face.

It was big and a deep cocoa-brown with what _appeared_ to be large chocolate chips sprinkled liberally throughout like... like snowflakes! Only chocolate. And in chip form. But seriously, it was the _biggest_ , most _tastiest_ looking muffin Naruto had _ever_ laid his eyes on. He drooled. Just a bit.

Then again, that was probably the starvation kicking in.

Hunger-induced fantasies, anyone?

Naruto had to be in dire straits if he was beginning to hallucinate. Though he had thought that his mind would have at least conjured the image of his beloved ramen if he was to die of hunger. The muffin was... random. Well, not really random just not the first thing that popped into his mind when he thought, ‘I’m so hungry’ or even ‘food.’

But the all time worst thing? The image was accompanied by the scent of chocolate and caramel and icing sugar.

 _That actually smells pretty good,_ he lamented, then brightened a little. _I must have one hell of an imagination._

“Well?”

Shifting his gaze _away_ from the imaginary muffin, Naruto looked curiously at his friend, Kiba. He blinked at the cinnamon-haired boy more than a little perplexed at their sudden stop. “Well, what?” He asked, glancing up and down the corridor. It lay empty. Like a barren wasteland. Minus the tumble weeds... and cannibalistic animals. Shouldn’t they hurry to their next class? Gai-sensei might— _Eh, on second thought._

Kiba jiggled his hand under Naruto’s nose. The imaginary muffin—strangely—moved with it. “Are you going to take it, or what?”

“Take _it_?”

It seemed Kiba wasn’t sure whether he should be amused or concerned. His brows were crinkled up in a bizarre manner and his lip twitched up then down and back again. “The muffin,” he elaborated and gave the sweet another shake for good measure.

It was real? It was _real_!

With a happy—and by most people’s standards, _loud_ — shout, Naruto leapt at it. Snatching the delicious morsel out of his startled friend’s hand, the blonde set about trying to fit as much of it into his mouth as humanly possible. Not too challenging a task given he could down a full bowl of ramen in ten seconds flat, then move on to the next _without_ stopping to breathe.

Oh yeah. He was the undisputed ramen eating champion.

“You’re the best, Kiba!” Naruto praised, though what it really sounded like was, “Yaw dim besp Meeba.” He spilled moist chocolate crumbs down his front. Blinking, he ignored it and attempted to force another bite into his already over-stuffed mouth.

The other boy shrugged his shoulders lazily, though he wore a pleased grin. “No problem, man,” he replied, somehow already fluent in Naruto-with-food-in-mouth-speak. Wow, it wasn’t even a week yet. “I knew you’d be late and like the other day, miss breakfast again. So I bought it on my way to school,” Kiba added. “Now maybe I won’t end up half deaf with your complaining about being hungry until break.”

At that, the blonde’s eyes zeroed in on the other boy and glared around his mouthful. Then swallowed. “Take that back!”

Kiba rolled his eyes and stuffed his hands into the pockets of his trousers, which like Naruto’s were a size or two bigger and pooled around his bulky, DC shoes. “You might want to slow down a bit or you’ll end up choking,” the taller boy suggested instead, as the pair continued down the air-conditioned corridor, to the stairwell at the end.

The corridor sort of reminded Naruto of a hospital with the slate-grey vinyl floor and off-white walls that _screamed_ institution... Freaky. Maybe that’s what the place really was. Or used to be. It made sense. With the ghost in the music room at night and the strange occurrences that happened elsewhere. Not to mention the sightings of Hana-chan that had a penchant for wandering around the girl’s bathroom down near the computer classes...

And stealing their bras.

Kiba said it was a load of shit. But refused to help prove it false. _Chicken_. Personally Naruto figured it was some pervert who couldn’t get any and taking bras was just for shits and giggles. Or to feed some kind of hording fetish.

Some people could be _so_ strange.

He took another— _smaller_ —bite from his muffin. Seriously. The thing was huge. Like, the Godzilla of all muffins or something. So far, it didn’t even look like he’d made a dent in its vast, spongy circumference. Not to mention the gooey, caramel centre.

_Mmmm._

Yup. He was definitely drooling now.

The next bite he took was decidedly bigger and he bounced down the broad, carpet covered staircase. From there, it took a moment to gather his bearings and head toward the correct door that would take him out of the building and towards the sports wing of the school. Even after attending for a week, sometimes the corridors got a little confusing. Especially the ones that had three intersections so close together and went to completely different wings.

He’d become lost quite easily more than once.

“So,” he began, having swallowed his mouthful once more and gestured at the other boy padding along beside him. “What did Gai-sensei have in store for us today? I kinda missed his speech the other day. You know being preoccupied with knocking shark-boy on his arse and all.”

Chuckling, Kiba rubbed the back of his neck. “I uh, wasn’t paying attention,” he admitted sheepishly. A slight tint of scarlet crested the bridge of his nose and cheeks. “Like you, I was preoccupied with watching ‘shark boy’ getting his arse handed to him. Though I think he may have mentioned something about basket ball?”

“As long as it’s not with the seniors class again,” Naruto grumbled, losing interest in his muffin abruptly. The sight of the chocolatey sponge losing some of its appeal.

“Which reminds me,” Kiba exclaimed, snapping his fingers as though struck by some epiphany. “Why did you look so annoyed when you first burst into class this morning? Before you noticed Kakashi-sensei, you looked ready to spit nails.”

 _This mornin—Oh. **Oh!** Right_. “I didn’t have ramen for dinner last night— _don’t_ ask—and missed it this morning, so of course I’d be annoyed. On top of that, I’m almost run over by this jerk while trying to cross the road—”

“What?” Kiba’s dark eyes were wide and his expression satisfyingly horrified and indignant on Naruto’s behalf. The blonde nodded.

“I managed to catch a ride with him to school but he was a complete _bastard_! I tried to have a conversation with him but would he answer? No. Though he was quite happy to ask his own question and expect answers,” Naruto muttered, dourly. “The jerk.”

By now, the cinnamon haired boy was looking sufficiently baffled and still a tad bit horror-struck. “You caught a ride to school. With a complete stranger? And this person actually _agreed_ to bring you here?”

Naruto shrugged and climbed the stairs that took him into the gymnasium that the boys usually took their class in. Once inside, he obediently removed his hightops as he studied the number of black, regulation school shoes lining the entrance way. The school was very strict about wearing shoes in the gymnasium. Not wanting the floors to be worn down and marked.

It was moments like this that Naruto missed being home schooled.

 _Guess everyone else is already getting changed,_ he concluded, hearing the muffled conversations drifting from within the boy’s changing room.

“Well he didn’t _really_ agree,” the blonde considered slowly, eyeing his muffin again. _To finish it now, or not to finish it now? Decisions, decisions._ “More like we were both heading here and he decided that the effort to get rid of me just wasn’t worth it,” he decided with a nod.

It seemed Kiba couldn’t get over the fact that Naruto had hitched a ride with a complete stranger. Even if said stranger apparently went to their school. “You don’t just get into a car with someone you don’t know. Didn’t your parents teach you any better?”

Naruto hid a grimace. “Funny,” he said, not sounding at all amused. If anything, his voice had become thoughtful. “That’s sort of what that bastard said...”

The warning _did_ hold some merit of wisdom. Hmm, he’d take that into account.

“So you keep calling this person a ‘jerk’ and a ‘bastard’ do I get a name with that?” Kiba questioned, moving on from disturbed to somewhat amused.

“Nope!” The blonde chirped, deciding he _would_ eat all of the muffin. It was way too nice to waste. Even if he did end up, bent over a bench and clutching at the stitch in his side for eating so soon before exercise. _Waste not. Want not._ “All I know is that he’s a senior. Moody as hell and a big fat liar! Oh and his hair style is...” he flapped his empty hand around, trying to work out the best way of verbalising his response.

“Afro?” the Inuzuka asked.

“No.”

“Oh, oh! Like Cloud from FF7!”

Naruto gave Kiba an odd look, then glanced down at his own fingers. Wondering how Kiba had managed to come up with the protagonist of his favourite Final fantasy game from the position of his splayed hand. It looked _nothing_ like Cloud’s hair style. “No. It was like—”

“Like a ducks arse?”

 _Genius!_ “YES!” Naruto exclaimed, leaping on the answer eagerly. Why had that not occurred to him earlier? That was exactly what the guy’s hair looked like! The arse of a bird! “And it was—”

“Kinda longish, even girly looking, in the front?”

“ _YES!_ Exactly.”

It was like Kiba was reading his mind! How cool was that? The elation rapidly dissolved as Naruto eyed his friend warily. What if he _could_ read minds? Naruto hadn’t known Kiba all that long and having the boy wandering the darkest corner of his mind wasn’t entirely welcome. Eyes narrowed, he decided to test the theory.

_I sleep naked in a tub full of warm, ramen. It’s my deepest, darkest secret._

The blonde waited for some type of expression to flicker across the other boy’s face. Nada. Not a thing. Well, there was _some_ flickering going on. But it definitely _wasn’t_ amusement or shock or even—

“Listen,” Kiba began hurriedly. “Was his car a black jaguar? The latest 2003 model?”

“I think so...” Naruto confessed, thinking over those details though confused as to why the make and model of the guy’s car even mattered.

“Shit,” Kiba muttered, appearance suddenly quite stressed. His natural tan leeching away until his skin took on a greyish hue. “He’s one of the most powerful guys at our school,” he hissed out. “You don’t want to piss him off. He’ll make your life a living hell!”

The blonde wasn’t impressed. That jerk wad was _that_ powerful? Sure, he’d heard all about the clichéd high school cliques but somehow never applied them to the Japanese school system. Mostly, he thought, because they all seemed so... consistent. He assumed that like their uniform and following of the über strict rules that everything else would be nothing but utter conformation. That any sort of thing that screwed with the conformity of the students would have been nipped out before it could grow to the point of idiocy. Apparently, he’d granted this school too much credit.

Naruto’s mouth twisted into a grim resignation. “So be it,” he muttered.

It was like the short stay in that American hellhole they called a school. The sheer stupidity of the students there made him sick. As did the fact that because of a select few—or the popular crowd, as it was known—the rest of the school—the majority—followed like spineless _sheep_.

The blonde didn’t understand it. Did these people not know that they had power in numbers? That they didn’t _have_ to take the shit dealt to them by the people they worshiped senselessly?

Naruto hadn’t stood for it. Doing his best to rally the underdogs. It helped that the people had taken an instant liking to him at the other temporary school and he was practically catapulted right to the top of the food chain. It had caused one hell of an uproar and he’d been expelled within a month but it was worth it. _So_ worth it. He just hoped that those he had taken under his wing weren’t cowed back into their original way of thinking.

“I’m being serious,” Kiba frowned.

Feeling indignation rise swiftly in his chest, Naruto took a large bite of his muffin. Heh, it was _slowly_ shrinking. It did nothing to aid the tightness from swelling in his chest. Though, it was also entirely possible that that was the large clot of muffin trying to make its way down his oesophagus.

He knew Kiba was being serious but chose not to answer.

After a while, it seemed the other boy had given up on getting a reply of any kind from Naruto. At least, that was what the blonde had presumed.

“So any reason for being biased against my muffin?”

 _Argh_.

Naruto _knew_ that question would pop up sometime. Really. He should have expected it after his excellent performance not five minutes before. Still, he didn’t expect it so soon. Not after their last conversation.

He promptly began to choke.

“Shit,” Kiba muttered and slapped the blonde on the back heartily. When this failed, he tried again. Harder. Then several times more.

Sadly, this was of little use. The soggy bite of muffin had lodged itself in Naruto’s throat and refused to come back up or go further down, blocking off his airway. He clutched at his neck and kept trying to hack the stubborn piece of food piece back up.

 _I can’t die like this,_ the blonde bemoaned his fate, eyes watering as he continued to choke. He was by now panicking. _Death by muffin. How embarrassing... It could have at least been Ramen._

“When I said you’d choke, I wasn’t actually _wanting_ you to choke!”

Naruto coughed. _Tried_ to cough, instead he started going blue in the face with the lack of oxygen and this, it seemed, was Kiba’s last straw because he pulled the other boy’s back to him and set about attempting to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre. His solid arms were thrust beneath Naruto’s, wrapped around the latter’s chest and thumb pressed to the space just below the middle of the blonde’s ribcage.

The slightly smaller boy was then picked up and thoroughly shaken. Yes, _shaken_. It seemed that Kiba didn’t know how to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre after all.

“Ah! Such wonderful examples of spring time youth!”

And what do you know? Apparently while Kiba was trying to shake the bejesus out of him, they had acquired an audience. The blonde may have laughed. If he _wasn’t_ still finding the ability to breath so difficult. But the look on his entire class was somewhat comical... and strangely coloured.

Absently, he realised they probably shouldn’t look like that. Though extremely unorthodox the shaking _had_ dislodged the muffin a bit and he was able to gulp. “Air,” he wheezed.

“Kiba-kun,” someone interrupted. Naruto thought it might have been Kakashi, though really he couldn’t be sure beyond the sound of his own weak attempts at capturing oxygen. “I think you’re killing Naruto-kun.”

“He’s choking!” Was Kiba’s strangled reply. He gave Naruto another hard thud on the back, almost sending the blonde staggering. “Help!”

“Moron.”

Funny, that voice sounded vaguely familiar.

Then Naruto was on all fours, head spinning, ears ringing and the stubborn, _evil_ little muffin bit lying several feet away. Best of all, sweet, _sweet_ air was now moving freely _in_ and out of his lungs. Relieved, he made good of use of the sponge-like organs to greedily suck in all the oxygen he could. It was like a drug and made his limbs feel all loose as he collapsed happily on the ground, heaving in massive douses.

“Are you okay, idiot? Careful you might choke again.”

_Oh hell no._

Naruto immediately tensed. Even though he’d heard that voice this morning, there was no mistaking _that_ low drawl. Especially now that he was no longer so perilously close to death. Despite himself, his head snapped up, face set into a scowl as he locked eyes with a set of onyx ones, several feet above his own. The other boy just stared down at him, face absolutely blank.

“ _You_ —” Naruto snapped, rocketing to his feet. Then nearly face planted again. He was saved from the embarrassment by the grip that Kiba had around the collar of his shirt.

“Well,” Kakashi intruded, his eyes all squinty with evil intent no doubt. Naruto eyed him cautiously, the dark-haired—and most unwelcome—senior glared, while the rest of the class of boys stared on, baffled. Kiba just looked like a kicked dog. “Now that was interesting,” the silver-blonde man stated.

Naruto had to disagree and shook Kiba free. “I don’t find almost dying—”

“Well done, Sasuke-kun!” Gai-sensei cut in this time, drawing Naruto’s ire upon himself unknowingly. He _jogged_ over to the three students, positively _beaming_ in that nonsensical youthful BS he was so well known for vomiting out at random. “Excellent demonstration on first aid and how to unclog someone’s airway!”

 _Wait. What?_ Naruto paused mid rant and glanced between those gathered around him.”Hey, back up the ramen train. Who the hell is Sasuke?”

“And Kiba. You get a gold star on what _not_ to do,” Kakashi added, clapping the cinnamon-haired boy on the back. _Almost_ sympathetically. “But several points for enthusiasm. You’ve effortlessly accomplished something that I’m certain many of your classmates have been secretly wanting to do since Naruto has joined our P.E class.”

Naruto shot his mad teacher a baffled glance. What did his joining their class have to do with anything?

The sudden and tense silence that fell over the class of boys was uncomfortable as the blonde cast his eyes over everyone. Several of his classmates refused to meet his gaze, some looking a little red-faced. Most of his classmates wanted to shake him? While that particular piece of information was a little disheartening—albeit not too surprising—the blonde refused to let it get him down. Though he did wish he knew what he’d done wrong to piss off so many people so fast.

The thing being, he had been under the impression that most of the guys actually liked him being around. _Guess they don’t like me as much as I assumed_ , he sighed inwardly. _But at least I have Kiba on my side!_

Kiba who looked like a beaten dog. Kiba who was cowering _away_ from the ominously towering senior. It made something in Naruto boil in annoyance that his friend felt the need to hide from the other male. So what if the bastard senior was all powerful? What if he was taller and had more muscle mass than Naruto or Kiba? So what if the other boy’s dark stare was fixed on the Inuzuka with an intensity that should send up warning bells to everyone in the general vicinity—not to mention neighbouring districts—that a war was swiftly approaching.

“Oi, leave him alone!” Naruto bit out, jabbing a finger into the raven-haired boy’s broad chest. _Heh._ It was a lot harder than the blond had anticipated. “Just because you’re a senior, doesn’t give you the right to belittle those who are your junior. Why don’t you go pick on someone else.”

A dark brow quirked slightly, though the senior’s face remained impassive and onyx eyes slid over to Naruto. The look seemed to imply, ‘Are you meaning yourself?’

Now Naruto’s blood was definitely _boiling_. And churning and filled with an inexplicable rage. “Bring it, bastard,” he growled, forgetting there was an audience that contained faculty members who would give him a detention for the use of bad language. Lunging forward, he grabbed the taller boy’s collar in an anger-tightened fist. “I will pound your arse into the ground just like I did with shark-boy.”

A bizarre expression flickered over the dark-haired boy’s face and before Naruto could register what was happening, the hand wrapped around the senior boy’s collar was being squeezed. Naruto dropped the death-grip in favour of surreptitiously tensing and straightening his throbbing digits. He refused to wince, but they burned horribly and he could _feel_ his pulse right down to the very tips. Though he would deny it, the fact the other made the gesture look so easy was a major blow to his masculine pride.

_What a complete arseh—_

“It’s not _my_ arse that is going to get ‘pounded into the ground’ as you put it,” the senior stated, coolly. The words so _calm_ that Naruto felt the childish urge to kick him in the family jewels just to break that unflappable countenance he wore like a cloak. To see the bastard red-faced in pain. “And,” the other added, tone dark in warning. “I think you’ll find that ‘shark-boy’ and I are on completely different playing fields.”

“Now, now boys,” Kakashi cut in, as he placed himself between the two boys. As though _that_ would keep them from ringing the other’s neck. As if. “Save the fire for the court. Naruto, Kiba go and get changed. Today, you’re going to play basketball with the seniors.”

“What?” Both boys burst out. Naruto in annoyance and Kiba in... Naruto wasn’t sure. But the feral-looking boy didn’t seem at all happy. He still looked a little intimidated.

Kakashi—the bastard—just grinned. Well, Naruto _assumed_ it was a grin. “That’s right! After so many of the basketball team members graduating, we need to find replacements.”

“Don’t you just have tryouts for that sort of thing?” Naruto muttered, not liking the idea of spending more time than necessary being around the broody, moody bastard senior that had taken such a strong dislike to him. That and because his pride was still smarting.

“Scared?”

Naruto’s eyes blazed and his hands fisted. “I hope you’re used to getting your arse handed to you, bastard,” he announced, feeling that slow crawl of challenge burn through him. Honestly, he couldn’t help it. He was going to prove this dickhead wrong. “You’re gonna be eating court. And who the hell is Sasuke?” he repeated again. Much louder this time since it was clear no one had heard his first inquiry. He glanced over at Kakashi.

“That would be him,” another boy, who Naruto belatedly recognised as shark-boy. When he’d joined the class, the blonde had no idea, though he suspected it was sometime between his choking and verbal sparring match. But the coup de grâce? Shark-boy was pointing to the dark-haired senior Naruto had not only conned a ride to school out of, but also fallen into several arguments with. “Sasuke Uchiha.”

The name rang a bell. _Several_. But Naruto couldn’t place the familiarity.

“Get ready to be served,” Naruto declared in flawless English with a grin. The look feral and stared the Uchiha down.

“We’ll see,” Sasuke replied in equally fluid English.

Naruto ground his teeth. So the bastard could speak English as well. No big deal. English was a must for most these days anyway. But was the Uchiha able to speak French, too? Or German and Spanish? Russian? The blonde doubted it. “Der Scheißkerl,” he muttered and was rewarded with a flicker of confusion at the German curse word.

_Oh yeah. Take that!_

“Naruto-kun, if you’re done. Would you mind changing into your P.E uniform?” Kakashi asked.

“Yes, sensei,” the blonde replied and turned to the boy’s changing room. Kiba had already vanished. Oh well. It’s not like that mattered right now anyway.

“Oh and Naruto?”

The teen paused and shot his annoyance of a teacher an impatient glance. What the hell did the man want now? All he wanted was to get dressed and show that jerk Uchiha that he wasn’t intimidated like everyone else seemed to be and prove that he was better than the other boy. “Yeah?”

“Detention after school.”

“What?” _That can’t be right_. The blonde spun around and started marching right back. Unknowingly posing the image of a predatory animal ready to strike. “Why?”

“Language,” Kakashi replied cheerily.

Effectively throwing Naruto off temporarily. What was the man meaning? Had he meant Naruto had again slipped into another language? Or was he meaning...oh. _Oh!_

With a fierce glower thrown at his teacher, the blond teen spun away. Muttering angrily under his breath the entire way. _Stupid pervert_ , he inwardly raged at the unfairness of everything. How was he getting a detention when the Uchiha had been provoking him? _I bet if he had been paying more attention to that lame porno book of his he wouldn’t have noticed._ “Arse kissing—”

“Make that two detentions, Mr Uzumaki.”

 _ARGH!_ Did he have to sound so damn happy? The blonde tugged at his hair viciously. Imagining it was someone else’s head. A silver-blonde haired someone. “Mother-fu—”

“ _Three!_ ”

Gods. He should never have gotten out of bed this morning. Everything had only gotten progressively worse.

 

* * *

 Now some of you are probably scratching your heads and thinking ‘What the heck?’ about some parts. Mainly, about the opening paragraphs. Yes, it seems a complete 180 of how Naruto described his physical appearance. That being short and scrawny. Both of which he is untrue. He just has some deep-seated insecurities in relation to the way he looks. Though this only ever comes out with his inner dialogue, while he projects himself as this incredibly confident individual to the outside world. This will be addressed at a later time in the story. Along with everything else.

Nor is he quite as stupid as he comes off as. Evident in the fact he speaks a number of languages fluently. Though, school work definitely _isn’t_ his thing. He lacks the attention span required.


	3. Friend

* * *

**III**

**Friend**

サスケxナルト

_Kiba Inuzuka? Yeah, yeah. Who hasn’t heard of dog-boy? He’s an outcast. He has that **strange** bond with his dog. This gigantic white... monster of a thing. It’s unnatural I tell you. I mean—get this; he used to carry it around with him **everywhere** —to school, the shops, he even managed to get it into a bathhouse once—until it outgrew him and now? He rides it. Like a horse! Heh, what were you thinkin’?_

_It’s sort of a shame, really. He’s got some talent on the soccer field. Is unrivalled, practically by anyone **except** Uchiha-san out there. I heard a few of the girls commenting on Inuzuka’s apparent good looks. Then again, that’s all girls are really good for, huh? _

_But what’s worse, is that somehow he was befriended by Naruto-san! And if you don’t know who he is, then you’re not a very good journalist, are you? I’m not the only one annoyed. Let’s just say, there are several higher up on the food chain that aren’t too happy with the Inuzuka right now. I’d hate to be in his shoes, man. Poor guy._

_And no. I won’t give you any names. Guys code of honour._

サスケxナルト

Naruto felt the insane desire to laugh.

It was followed the equally appealing want to taunt the uptight Uchiha jerk-wad to hell and back.

The Uzumaki did neither.

Mostly because he was still racing down the court, P.E shirt—which rather resembled a white basketball singlet anyway, not that he was judging or anything—plastered to his body with sweat. It made things _really_ uncomfortable and he was partially blinded by the sodden strands of dark gold hair that hung over his eyes and in his face. But that was okay. He could deal with that later. Maybe then he’d also pause to breathe properly, too. The rasping burn of his lungs was irritating as hell and his heart felt like it was about to give out and yeah, maybe his limbs felt a tad bit too jelly-like to be entirely comfortable with everything...

But damn it. He was _not_ going to let that bastard win!

 _Over my dead body_ , he vowed in determination. His every movement focused on the basket ball in his possession as he neared the hoop and readied himself for taking the shot. _C’mon, Naruto! You can do this_... His arms rose, ball held between sure hands—

Then it was _gone_.

“Nice try, moron.”

Naruto blinked in bemusement as a blur of black and white and red shot back down the courts. _Shit_. He’d forgotten how freakishly fast the Uchiha moved. _That_ had been a startling surprise at the beginning of the game. However, the dark-haired boy _wasn’t_ the fastest Naruto had ever played against and the Uzumaki had already learned how to counter the speed. At least, when it came to basketball. He’d been forced to master circus shots and he’d just wasted a _perfect_ opportunity.

Gah. He felt like smacking himself. Then maybe kicking the Uchiha for good measure. Hey, I’d make him feel better.

Spinning around, he raced after the other boy. “Get back here, Uchiha!”

They were in the last few minutes of the final quarter now and he was _tired_. Even he only had so much stamina to keep him running and—not that he’d _ever_ admit it, he’d die first—keeping up with Sasuke during their basketball match was a little harder than it _really_ should have been.

It didn’t help that the Uchiha was a _giant_ and had a greater reach. And _of course_ , the pair would be on opposing teams. Because Kakashi was just evil that way and Gai was a sick, _sick_ and twisted individual who _thrived_ on competition and honestly, because the world was a cruel place. But Naruto wouldn’t have had the game any other way.

He suspected as much of his dark-haired sempai.

It was really, sort of telling, when the bastard Uchiha had smirked as he was made captain of his team while Naruto was given the captaincy of the second. Both had _refused_ to sub out and Gai decided that since everyone seemed so enthusiastic, there wouldn’t be a halftime break.

Talk about dedication. Read; _Slave driver_. Though that Lee guy—the one Naruto had dubbed the little Gai-clone—seemed sickeningly pleased.

Still the match was nothing if not incredibly fast paced. Both sides so evenly matched that if one team scored a goal the other was right on the first’s heels, with neither of the team captains willing to concede defeat until it was practically a one on one game. The rest of the class standing on the sidelines, panting in exhaustion or cheering on their team captain. Although in some cases, the _opposite_ team’s captain.

Such as Kiba was currently doing.

Naruto was a little surprised to see that Shino Aburame—the guy with a weird and perhaps slightly unhealthy fixation on bugs—was seated at Kiba’s side. The lower half of his face had a thick charcoal scarf wrapped around it, leaving only his short dark hair peeking out. How he got away with the sunglasses Naruto would never know.

Chouji Akimichi was seated on the bench in front of the pair, the hair that fell down his solid back making him appear like some sort of deranged auburn hedgehog. His attention was fixed on the bag of potato chips in his hand as he munched through it with an enthusiasm that would put Naruto to shame when it came to him devouring his ramen.

The lazy, class genius Shikamaru Nara lay napping next to him. Somehow impervious to the noise going on around him and the Uzumaki couldn’t help but compare him to a downed palm tree. All long and thin with jet-black leaves jutting from his head.

“Go Naruto!” Kiba cheered, loudly from the sideline as the blonde dashed down court to try and intercept the ball as it was dribbled. “Kick his arse!”

Waiving him off, Naruto lunged around the taller boy in an attempt to retrieve the ball. He was ridiculously pleased to discover that he _wasn’t_ the only one suffering the ill effects of a near forty minute game without a break. The elder boy was equally as sweat-dampened and panting. Though not nearly as loud as Naruto.

“Give up,” Sasuke suggested, eyes dark.

Naruto met the other’s stare head on. “I never give up. Believe it!”

“Hn. Loser.”

“What did you call me?” The blonde hissed— _attacked_ —and failed the second attempt at snagging the ball. He glared through a soggy, golden fringe and ground his teeth. “I’ll show you who the ‘loser’ is, jerk!”

The senior smirked.

Naruto growled and dodged in again. Fingers brushing the ball and narrowly missing the take. If he didn’t get it soon. They’d be too close to the other’s goal and from what the blonde had already witnessed, the guy had very good aim. _Scary_ good, actually. _But he has nothing on It—_

It all ended with a flash of strawberry-blonde. Not just _any_ strawberry-blonde. No, it was the prettiest red-pink, strawberry-blonde Naruto had _ever_ had the pleasure of laying his eyes on. His eyes swivelled to follow it and he perked up.

_Sakura-chan!_

The whistle blew. Cheers arose. Signalling the game had ended and Naruto glanced away from the girl to see that the Uchiha had just scored. Winning the game by two points. He blinked, wide blue eyes. Disbelief flooded his system. It couldn’t have just ended. He refused to believe he’d just lost to that... _that_ —

“What the hell?” He exclaimed—the sound exploded through the gymnasium like thunder and _everyone_ winced. Himself included—then spun on the Uchiha and pointed. “I demand a rematch!”

“You’re welcome to try,” the elder boy replied in a drawl. His breathing had evened out and his lips were quirked up in a contemptuous almost-smirk. Though, for reasons Naruto couldn’t work out, the boy seemed annoyed. “That is, if you feel like being humiliated in front of everyone like this. A second time.”

 _Probably worried next time I’d beat him_ , Naruto speculated, the sound of his own panting filling his ears. Scrubbing the sweat from his eyes with the back of his hand, he grinned spitefully. “Scared?” He asked, employing the same taunt the dark-haired boy had used on him.

“Of an idiot like you?” Sasuke asked, sounding vaguely amused by that. His expression was indifferent but his dark eyes glittered.

Growling, Naruto stalked over to the taller boy. So the Uchiha didn’t think he had anything to be worried about, did he? Well, Naruto would show him _exactly_ why he should be concerned. “Why I oughta—”

“Whatever. _Dead last_.”

_GRRRRRRR._

“SASUKE-KUN!”

 _Oh Holy Gods_. Naruto took a step back and froze at the sudden earthquake. At least it _felt_ like an earthquake. The floor beneath his feet quaked—and he really, seriously thought he was about to topple over—and there was that, grating high-pitched squeal that foretold of windows ready to shatter.

Really though, it was a stampede of screaming girls trying to get at... _Oh, surprise, surprise_ , he thought sarcastically and glared at the Uchiha. Now the blonde was a fond admirer of the fairer sex but that shit was just... _Scary_. Scary enough that he only felt a _little_ annoyed that the girls were swarming the dark-haired boy and paying him little to no attention.

Naruto swore he could see those little hearts and flowers and lacy bits from girly manga floating before his vision as he was nearly trampled to death. Not that he read that sort of girly thing. But he’d gotten curious a few times...

It was all, a little bit overwhelming for Naruto. Well, honestly it was just the girls’ perfume. It was like... like... the perfume counter at Barneys! A thing of dreams and nightmares. Something to be respected. And a guy with _any_ kind of sense knew to avoid it at all costs. If he _didn’t_ , he was likely to have the sensitive tissues of his nose eaten away by the cloying mists that were often used to beguile the senses. Not that the blonde disliked the smell of perfume, he just didn’t like it much in such concentrated doses. And _it_ didn’t agree with him.

He sneezed.

Now was time to leave. Naruto could admire the girls another day. _Yeah_. When they weren’t nearly so rabid looking. Hurriedly, he slunk away and was glad of his own stench, if not he’d likely never have managed to navigate the female landmine. Or rather, _they_ wouldn’t have moved to let him by. He almost felt sorry for the Uchiha.

Haha. Yeah, _right_. And dogs flew all the time.

“Nice one Uzumaki-kun,” someone—Naruto wasn’t sure who—congratulated, as he joined the steady flow of boys that were heading for the showers. “If it weren’t for the girls coming in last minute to watch, you would have tied for sure.”

“Thanks.”

An arm was slung around his shoulder, the weight and warmth familiar. “Too bad, man,” Kiba sighed. “I thought for sure you would have scored when you had the ball in your court.”

“I should have taken the shot on the run instead of pausing to line it up.”

Kiba shrugged. “Could happened to anyone,” he reasoned. “You actually had the Uchiha on the run for most of that quarter.”

“Yeah, well,” Naruto shrugged himself then pulling out from beneath his friend’s arm, began tugging off his singlet. It was heavy and clung to him like a second skin. He slung the article over his shoulder and scrubbed at the sweat trickling over his mouth with the sweatband on his wrist. “He isn’t the fastest I’ve ever played before, so I was prepared. His game isn’t all that different from the other guy I played, either,” he paused, deliberating.

Now that he actually thought back on it. There were _a lot_ of similarities between the Uchiha and his old friend. And it wasn’t simply the way they played—all analytical and precise movements—but mannerisms and other things, too. _Hmmm._

“Nice game, Naruto-kun!”

“Sakura-chan!” His head snapped around and he beamed over at the girl. He’d just managed to get his heart under control and now it was back to the velocity of a racehorse at the track. Perhaps a little faster and exquisitely _light_.

The girl was smiling at him, her gorgeous jade-green eyes _sparkled_. He’d officially died and gone to heaven. Sakura _wasn’t_ gushing over the Uchiha like most of the other girls from his and the senior class! She was here, congratulating him!

“I’ve never seen anyone make Sasuke-sempai work so hard to keep the ball in his court,” she added. Silently, Naruto preened. Taking in her every word, her every glance like a flower drinking in sunlight. “You’ll be made his co-captain for sure!” She congratulated, though Naruto wasn’t sure how to respond to that. He didn’t want to be the Uchiha’s anything. Certainly not his co-captain.

The Inuzuka sent his friend a sidelong glance. “I don’t think Naruto was playing Uchiha with the intention of becoming the co-captain of the team.”

Sakura blinked, looking slightly confused. “I still think you’d make an great co-captain,” she pressed, leaning forward toward Naruto. “Your style is the complete opposite from Sasuke-sempai. With you on the school team, we’d be unstoppab—”

“Who wants to play with that bastard?” Naruto cut in, thoroughly put out with the mention of his arch nemesis not once but several times. And—he tilted his head quizzically—he could have sworn he saw Sakura’s fist clench at his words. _Ah!_ Naruto realised with a start, _Maybe Sakura-chan dislikes the dickwad as much as I do._ Made sense. After all, the dark-haired senior was an uptight prick and Sakura was, after all, very smart and therefore wouldn’t be taken in by the Uchiha. Even if he _was_ a senior.

“Anyway,” Sakura smiled. It looked a little strained—and revealed a bit too much teeth to be completely normal, but then they had been talking about the Uchiha-bastard, so really, he shouldn’t be too terribly surprised. “Good game!” She finished, still smiling at the blonde who returned the gesture tenfold. Blinding practically everyone around him. Not that he noticed or anything, watching as Sakura hastily wandered off to the girl’s changing room.

“You _like_ her.”

Startled, Naruto glanced over at his friend to find Kiba eyeing him carefully and wasn’t sure what to make of the sudden scrutiny. The boy wasn’t exactly what Naruto would have deemed the observant type.

“What’s not to like about her?” The blonde asked with a contented sigh. It wasn’t like he was hiding the fact that he liked the girl, though being called out on it now was strange to him. “Sakura-chan is beautiful and kind-hearted. Plus she’s really smart!”

“And in love with the Uchiha, like practically every other girl at this school.”

 _What?_ Naruto kept the smile on his face despite the fact it wanted to crawl into a gutter somewhere and die. But... But Sakura had come to congratulate _him_ for nearly beating the Uchiha! She’d said that he’d played well and would likely be made the team’s vice captain. She hadn’t even looked in the other boy’s direction. Didn’t that mean something?

Kiba sighed, looking largely uncomfortable all of a sudden. “I’m not telling you all this to be a bastard. Just thought I’d give you a heads up.”

Thinking over the other’s words, Naruto shrugged and grinned over at Kiba. “I’ll just have to show her I’m better than that bastard, then,” he declared. He’d almost done it already. And weren’t most females hell bent on going after the guys that were the strongest? The most powerful?

Naruto figured it was a latent trait that went back to when humankind was ruled by their more primal instincts. In the animal kingdom a female would choose only the strongest mate. To protect her and their offspring. To ensure only the strongest of genes survived. It was a pretty rough world and even though humans tried to place themselves in a different category, when it came down to it, they weren’t all that different to the animals they thought they were better than. He would know much better than most.

It was about then that he noticed the rather flushed looking Hinata Hyūga standing off to the side, twiddling her fingers almost nervously. Though Naruto had no idea what she had to be nervous about. Was Shark-boy—or Suigetsu Hoshigaki as he’d been informed by Kiba while getting changed—teasing her again? He clenched his fist. If he caught that douche mocking Hinata-chan again, next time he wouldn’t be so nice.

“Heya Hinata-chan!” He waved at her as he dispelled his anger. It wasn’t her he was pissed at, after all.

She instantly turned bright red in the face, uttered what may have been, “Naruto-kun, you play very well!”—though he couldn’t be entirely sure through all the stuttering, low-speaking and general flushing—then promptly turned around and fled.

He blinked in surprise at the sudden departure, then rubbed at his sweat covered neck in confusion. “Okay. Bye Hinata-chan!”

He could have sworn he heard her squeak. She was one strange girl. Strange, but she was also really quite sweet-natured and very gentle. He doubted that she had one mean bone in that surprisingly curvy little body of hers.

Kiba, for reasons unknown, looked somewhat bemused by the exchange.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Kiba replied with a shrug. He was using his P.E shirt to mop at his hair that was plastered to his face and neck. “So, you and Hinata-chan are on a first name basis?”

Naruto considered. “Kinda,” he divulged at length. “I just started speaking to her after beating up what’s-his-face. He was saying some pretty rude things about her and no one said anything to stop him.”

“So _that’s_ why you hit him,” Kiba marvelled, looking surprised and slightly pissed himself. “Never would have pegged you to be the chivalrous type.”

Naruto shrugged. He wasn’t exactly sure he’d be considered the chivalrous type, either. “So,” he grinned and shot his friend a sly look. “Do _you_ like Hinata-chan?”

Kiba frowned and seemed to actually consider the question before shrugging himself. “She’s a nice girl,” he agreed readily and Naruto’s grin almost widened. “One of the few who have no interest in Uchiha and I’ve known her since we were in elementary school. She’s... I don’t know, cool, I guess.”

 _Huh_ , not exactly what the blonde was expecting. And didn’t really answer his question.

“But...” Kiba added. “I don’t think she’s interested in me.”

 _Oh..._ It was difficult, but Naruto held in his grimace. _Ouch_. Hadn’t they just been over his own un-requited feelings for Sakura?

“C’mon,” he suggested, hurrying toward the changing room, dragging Kiba along behind him. “We’ve got ten minutes until break and I need to shower and grab something to eat from one of the vending machines.”

And of course things couldn’t be quite _that_ simple. Oh no. Because today was a shitty day and required more than missing breakfast, almost getting run over by the school’s resident top dog, losing to said top dog in a basketball match _in front_ of his crush and landing himself _three_ detentions.

“Hey dickless. Nice show back there.”

Simplicity was overrated. At least, that was what the universe seemed to be screaming at Naruto, because typically he ran into his sempai, Sai. All round weirdo and artist who had a bizarre fixation on the Uzumaki’s nether regions. And when we say fixation, people, we mean full on _obsession_. Yeah, it was that bad. Sai had even gone on to draw _several_ pictures of his favourite subject dubbing them thus; Fishcake Jr number one through to nine.

Naruto had heard that Sai was currently working on a _tenth_. How he managed to draw it in so many different angles _while_ remaining flaccid—with so much detail, right down to the little mole after seeing it _once_ —would be amazing were it not so mortifying that it was _his_ junk on public display.

Naruto’s resulting screech was heard throughout the gymnasium. The sound echoing around, distorting the words slightly as it ricocheted from wall to wall and polished, tiled floor to steel-beamed roofs.

“STOP CALLING ME DICKLESS!”

サスケxナルト

By the time lunch had rolled around, Naruto was tired.

No tired didn’t quite cut it. Try half-dead and you’d be closer to his level of exhaustion, which, when it came to Naruto, was extremely surprising. But even he could only take so much for one day and this one had surely been sent from the very pits of Hell.

_Gods. Take me now._

“That could have gone better,” Naruto muttered as be plopped himself down on the seat—it was the only vacant one that could be found. Well no, that wasn’t right because the whole area was cleared of all human life for about a ten-foot radius. Excluding the solitary being he’d joined, that is—and turned to his glaring, red-headed neighbour. Idly he noted the other boy’s jade-green eyes looked particularly furious today.

 _Probably having as shitty a day as me,_ the blonde decided in some sympathy and would have gave the other a understanding pat on the back if he weren’t so terrified of losing a limb for such an action. Now, if the other boy didn’t look nearly so rabid, then maybe he’d have reconsidered. _Maybe_. “So, what do you think about the homework Azuma-sensei assigned us?

Insert darker glare courtesy of the redhead.

Right. Well. As long as Naruto had known Gaara, the boy barely said a word. Not that they knew each other all that well. No. All the Uzumaki knew of the other boy was that he kept to himself and glared at anything that moved and was—much like Naruto himself—of a mixed bloodline. Granted, the blonde had no idea _exactly_ what the mixture was, entirely. Some said English, others Scottish and another lot claimed Irish. One thing was for certain, and that was Gaara carried Japanese blood in his veins the rest was up for debate.

“Yeah,” the blonde agreed with the nonverbal response. “I suppose you don’t want to talk about it either after all that running around in basketball. And hey, that one-handed over-the-head thing you pulled on Uchiha, was _awesome_! You’ve got some real skill. I wouldn’t be surprised if you got asked to join the team...” _If, you know, people wouldn’t just drop the ball and run whenever you go near them._

“Did you want anything in particular, Uzumaki?”

The blonde exhaled in surprise. Gaara actually spoke! Sure, he was still glaring at Naruto pointedly but it wasn’t nearly as dark as the kinds of looks he shot everyone else. At least, not quite and he was actually offering up conversation! ...of a sort. Hey, it was more than the standard one, two or four word sentences he offered everyone else. Teachers included.

 _Progress!_ Naruto’s mind inwardly chimed in delight.

“Not really,” he replied verbally, prodding at the obento-box he’d just purchased from the school cafeteria. Really, he’d have preferred Ramen but chicken katsu wasn’t that bad. After snapping his chopsticks apart and a quick “Itadakimasu!” He took a bit out of the crumbed bit of chicken and murmured his approval. Not bad at all, though it had nothing on home-made lunches. _Still loads better than starving_. He took a sip of his miso soup. “I just decided that I wanted to eat with you!”

He wasn’t sure if the look Gaara sent him was one of disapproval, confusion or surprise because it was gone in the next instant to be replaced by a glare at something over Naruto’s shoulder. Turning, the Uzumaki discovered it was Kiba staring at him and Gaara wearing the strangest expression.

“Kiba!” Naruto yelled, and waved him over, “come join us.”

Was it him, or was everyone suddenly watching? Maybe he had food on his face? Subtly, he tried to spy his reflection in his can of orange juice. _No. Hmmm. Odd._ He glanced up and— _Yup. Still watching._

“Sabaku,” Kiba muttered, his own obento gripped between his hands as though it were some priceless gem. Stiffly, he lowered himself next to Naruto and set about breaking his own pair of chopsticks, though he was wielding them more like a weapon than any kind of eating utensil and there was sweat roiling down the back of his neck. Probably because Gaara had yet to stop glaring at him.

“Aren’t you gonna grab something to eat?” Naruto asked, not completely immune to the stifling silence that seemed to have fallen over the entire cafeteria. Nor Kiba’s obvious discomfort at being the target of Gaara’s potent death-glares.

For a moment, Gaara’s eyes shifted away from Kiba. “No.”

“Awkward...” Kiba muttered, about to take a bite from his mayonnaise covered eggroll.

It didn’t reach his mouth. He was bumped from behind, sending it tumbling onto his chest with a messy splat. It sort of resembled bird shit, actually. It was kind of lucky that it he hadn’t put his blazer or sweater back on after P.E.

“Oh, my bad. I didn’t see ya there,” someone snickered.

Naruto’s eyes snapped up to glare at culprit and wasn’t all that surprised to discover who it was. The boy’s arms were crossed over his chest and his strangely pale coloured hair fell around his face, where his twisted looking grin revealed his oddly sharp teeth. There was a redhead at his side who flushed slightly when she caught Naruto looking at her.

“You bastard, you did that on purpose!” Kiba growled as he shot up in his seat, his hands clenched at his sides.

“And if I did?” Suigetsu leered. “What are you gonna do about it?”

It seemed that it took some people more than one lesson to actually learn something. And the Uchiha said that _he_ was bad when it came to the blonde stereotype. _Pfft_ , Naruto inwardly scowled. _Right_.

Seizing one of his chopsticks, the Uzumaki took aim and flicked—

_Smack._

“MY EYE!” The senior yowled, his hand flying to rub furiously at his injury after it was struck by the projectile chopstick.

Kiba’s own howl of laughter soon followed and Naruto saw him double over on himself as he tried to contain it, smearing more of the mayonnaise down his front. The eggroll fell on to the floor. “Not so smug now, huh Hoshigaki?” He asked and broke out into another fit of loud chuckles.

The area around Suigetsu’s injured eye was red as he pulled away his hand. It’s other, uninjured partner was narrowed on Naruto hatefully. “You fuckin’ little shit!” He snapped, “I will make you regret that. “

More than ready for it, Naruto rose from his seat and shifted his stance.

“Leave,” came a low, rough voice that took Naruto—and everyone else too, it seemed—completely by surprise.

Turning, Naruto found Gaara seated exactly as he had been before, except now he had his glare fixed on Suigetsu and the Uzumaki was startled at the level of malevolence that radiated from the redhead. At how dense the air around them had abruptly become. Almost as if it was trying to smother everyone.

“Pfft,” Suigetsu snorted, though he did back up. His eyes flickered from Gaara to Naruto, then Kiba. “This ain’t over,” he warned and took his leave. The redhead girl following behind, though not without shooting Gaara terrified looks.

With a sigh, Naruto sank back into his seat and offered Gaara a bright, sunny grin. “Thanks!” He wasn’t the least bit surprised when the boy didn’t react at all to his words. He supposed that he’d probably exceeded his quota of Gaara-interaction for the day or maybe Gaara had simply run out of patience to spend on him? Regardless, the blonde was just pleased that the boy had bothered speaking to him at all.

Instead, the redhead glanced around the cafeteria and the noise instantly picked back up.

He found himself slightly envious of his classmates ability to do that then immediately turned sombre when something much more horrible came to his attention.

Biting his lip, Naruto glanced down at his obento and remaining chopstick he still had clutched in his hand. Seriously, he should have put a little more thought in to what he was doing because now he wasn’t going to be able to eat unless he used his fingers...

_Gah. Why me?_

“Naruto-kun?”

He peered up through his fringe to find Sakura standing next to him, looking a little self-conscious. “Here,” she said and it took a moment for him to register the fact that she was holding out a new pair of chopstick to him. They were wrapped in a fancy—if pink and flowery—napkin. “I always bring spares with me to school every day and since your other one was lost...”

“Thank you, Sakura-chan!” He beamed feeling warmth flood through him at her thoughtfulness. “This is very kind of you.”

She smiled at him and went back to her table.

And Naruto melted just a little more inside. He took it all back. Today wasn’t a shitty day at all. Despite missing breakfast; being late; almost getting run over; the three detentions; almost choking; his embarrassing loss to Uchiha, it was all worth it, if it meant that he’d gain Sakura’s attention and kindness again.

“I’m home!” He called, closing and locking his apartment door behind him.

Silence. Once again.

Kicking off his shoes and then placing them carefully on the shoe-shelves in the entrance, he pulled on a pair of his slippers and made his way into the large kitchen. Dropping his bag next to the counter and glanced up at the lone frame that stood there for his viewing pleasure. He smiled at it softly.

“Hi Ma,” he began softly, caressing the frame. “I had the strangest day today.

“I was up late— _again_ —and ended up missing breakfast. Then I was almost run over by this total jerk that happens to go to be a senior at my school, but I managed to get him to give me a ride there—which isn’t so bad I guess—but we don’t get along.

“And uh... I got three detentions and then had this basketball match against that same bastard... I lost—but it was a fluke! I’ll beat him next time, don’t you worry, Ma.

“Then at lunch, I got Gaara to talk to me some more! I know he’s not the most talkative but he’s okay and he spoke and he sorta got me out of another fight, so I’m sure you’d like him. And you know that girl I told you about? Sakura-chan? Well—”

No. Today wasn’t that bad a day at all. It could be worse.


	4. Acquaintance

* * *

**IV**

**Acquaintance**

サスケxナルト

_Most people call him Gaara of the sand waterfall. I’m still not quite sure why. He only transferred in last year but he has this rep, y’know? He’s known as the school psycho. No one wants to piss him off. Ha! Even that bastard Uchiha keeps his distance._

_See, Sabaku’s from Suna’s academy and that is one hell of a school to go to. Everyone from there was scared of him, too._

_Kinda hard not to be._

_You didn’t see the state that he left this one group of guys in. Idiots. They had no idea what they were getting into. Still, they were just a group of punks that used to terrorize students in the area if they were caught walking home alone. So I guess they sorta deserved it, but still. I heard the only reason that the police didn’t get involved was because they were paid to turn a blind eye._

_I sure hope Naruto knows what the hell he’s getting himself into... But knowing him? He’s probably oblivious._

サスケxナルト

Scowling, Naruto studied the math equation in front of him as he gnawed on the end of his pen. He was always told that doing so was a bad habit to get into and was quite difficult to break. Personally, he thought that Deidera paid far too much attention to what he was doing to have even noticed Naruto’s minor oral fixation. Not that Deidera could comment now. What with him being in an entirely different country and all.

“Naruto-kun?”

Glancing up from his schoolwork, Naruto smiled when he found Sakura standing beside his desk. She looked slightly strange for reasons he didn’t quite understand and if the class was quieter than normal, he paid it little attention. Too distracted by the glowing pinkness that was spreading across Sakura’s cheeks and the fact that her skirt seemed a tad shorter than was normal for her. But he’d think on that later.

“Hey Sakura-chan!” He replied and put his book aside, secretly wondering what she wanted. It wasn’t like she needed his help in class. “What is it?”

“I was just...” Her face turned slightly pinker as she stared at him, her eyes larger than usual and glittering as if... as if—What? “Will you go out with me?”

For a second, Naruto froze. Disbelief and happiness warring within, swelling up like volcano about to erupt. Then it was gone and it felt like he’d been given a jab of morphine or something and the feeling shot straight through his body, leaving him feeling oddly weightless. Breathless. He wondered if that’s what it felt like to be out in space. “Of cour—”

“No.”

What the— Naruto turned to find Sasuke standing next to him in a jester suit with floppy jester hat and everything. But there was nothing remotely amusing about his expression as he stared at Sakura with a blankness that was ever so slightly disconcerting. He was tapping an elf-like shoe covered foot that jiggled every time it moved.

“Shut-up, jerk!” Naruto snarled at him. Must he ruin everything? “Shouldn’t you be cleaning my room right now?” The utter strangeness of that statement should have bothered him. It didn’t. Nor did the weirdness of Sasuke’s purple, gold and scarlet attire.

Naruto glanced back at Sakura but she had vanished, to be replaced with Hinata.

“Hinata-chan?” He asked confused. She just stared at him, face pink and fingers twiddling. She was clad in a white dress that Naruto usually associated with flower girls at weddings. It had large, puffy sleeves edged in white frills. The skirt; bell-shaped and knee length, with plenty of ruffles and lace and layer after layer of tulle petticoats that had to weigh a ton. She looked the picture of absolute innocence.

Kiba stood between them, glancing back and forth. “Give up on Sakura,” he suggested and stood off to the side.

Naruto blinked at the peculiarity of it all. He blinked again. Was it him, or was it getting a little... _drafty_?

“Hinata-chan,” Naruto repeated, looking around for Sakura but all he found was the gymnasium, teeming with classmates that where chanting something he couldn’t quite catch. He turned to Kiba. “Where—?”

“Give up, idiot,” Sasuke suggested and there was a strangeness to his voice that made Naruto look at him. The senior was in his P.E gear, now. A look of smug superiority on his pale face and Sakura on his arm. “You lose.”

Azure eyes were strangely drawn down and Naruto realised with great horror that he was standing among his peers completely naked but _that_ wasn’t the worst of it. Not at all. With an unbridled horror that was maddening, his hand slipped down _there_ to check and check again what had to be some sort of optical illusion. But no. He was sure all the blood had escaped his face. It wasn’t a trick at all and suddenly he felt waves of terror he’d never before experienced except when he’d lost—

“ _No_.”

“I give you, Fishcake number ten!” Sai announced, holding out an ornate silver tray with a single, thumb-sized carrot on display. The skin was peeling off and browned and it appeared to be sizzling where it lay. Almost curling in on itself. It smelled of something decidedly sweet. Almost like a—

“Pancake,” Sai smiled and produced a silver fork. “Want a try?”

With a start, Naruto found himself back on his black suede couch, half-dressed body sprawled across the vast surface with a sock missing from one of his feet and a pool of saliva escaping the corner of his mouth. He scrubbed it away, his eyes flickering around the room frantically. His heart slamming against his chest like a wrecking ball, trying to break through the confines that housed it.

Everything _looked_ as it should.

Nothing seemed out of place and there were no random objects that belonged elsewhere suddenly sprouting from the dark wooden floor. The room was still overly large and sterilely white, with the massive plasma T.V set into the wall. The only break of colour being the black lounge suite; thick crimson rug set beneath the low but wide gas fireplace; and the stacks upon stacks of CDs and DVDs.

Now _that_ was sorted out.

Immediately, he tugged open his boxers just to be sure that— _Thank you gods!_ —it was still there. Horribly relieved, he produced a contented sigh at the confirmation that he was _still_ very much in one piece. He released the elastic of his boxers as his other hand ran down his weary, cold-sweat covered face and exhaled a shaky breath.

Gods, that had to be the weirdest dream ever and he’d had plenty of weird and horribly confusing dreams before. But this, this really took the cake. The memory alone had him cringing pathetically.

Surely, being made into the human equivalent of a Ken-doll was every guys’ nightmare. He hadn’t even been turned into a girl! Just a dickless boy.

“Don’t worry,” he assured, giving his satin covered pride and joy a fond glance, “I won’t let _anything_ happen to you.” He gave it a happy—still thoroughly relieved—pat only to pause at the sudden choking sound. Very carefully, he turned his head to discover one pink-cheeked Iruka Umino standing in the doorway, spatula in one hand and a plate of something in the other.

Naruto blinked at him slowly.

“I’ll be in the kitchen!” The pink-faced man announced, then shuffled back out as fast as he could.

It took Naruto a moment more to realise what had just transpired. Then his heart stopped. And immediately kicked into overdrive.

“It wasn’t what it looked like!” He sputtered face feeling remarkably hot. He leapt from the couch, his one socked-foot had him sliding across the polished ground as he desperately tried to keep his balance and plead his case as he raced after his old teacher.

 _I’m never going to live this down. Curse you, gods!_ He lamented. _I thought we’d made up already!_

“I wasn’t doing anything!” Naruto gasped, finally making it into the kitchen where Iruka stood at the stove. The man was still very clearly embarrassed having intruded on what he thought was Naruto seeing to his... er, morning needs.

 _Gah_. And everything was just all kinds of awkward right now.

“I just, I had this weird-arse dream about Sakura-chan proposing to me!” He began desperately and realised _that_ probably didn’t help the situation. Pausing, he mentally slapped himself in the face. Was he trying to make things worse? _Seriously_? Hastily, he carried on. “But Sasuke-bastard showed up looking like a court jester telling me I couldn’t. Then Sakura-chan vanished and Hinata-chan appeared with Kiba between us looking all confused and then I was standing naked in the gymnasium with the whole school watching as the bastard stole Sakura-chan from me! And, and then I noticed Mini-Me was gone and Sai had it on a platter, but it looked like a boiled and peeled carrot and was showing it to everyone!”

Iruka’s eyes slid over to him slightly, apparently trying to determine the truth of Naruto’s outburst.

“It was also much smaller than it actually is,” Naruto added. Just in case Iruka thought that it was small or something. Yeah. Not that it was. There was nothing wrong with the size of Naruto Jr. Sai was just blind... and had issues. “Then Sai offered it to me and called it a pancake.”

“Oh.” Iruka breathed then smiled, awkwardly. He looked horribly disturbed. And so he should! “I see.”

Naruto nodded in affirmative and folded his arms over his naked chest before fixing his eyes on what the brunet was doing. Curious—and ravenous at the delicious scent that infused the air and was curling up and into his nostrils—Naruto tottered over. Discomfit forgotten in favour of hungrily eyeing the food that was being prepared. “Wha’cha making, Iruka-sensei?”

“I thought I’d make you French toast—since I haven’t been able to check in on you as often as I’d have liked—though I’m not sure you deserve it,” the man said, quite stern all of a sudden and Naruto slumped where he stood. He peered up at Iruka through his messy fringe but the elementary teacher was unperturbed by the look. “Three detentions, Naruto?”

The teen rubbed at the back of his neck in shame. “I can explain... You see—”

“And you skipped your appointment with the school counsellor. _Again_ ,” Iruka added, disappointment colouring his words. He stared at Naruto in disapproval. “Naruto, we had an agreement when you were enrolled at Konoha Gakuen,” he went on, though his tone had softened some and his eyes held understanding.

Naruto felt lower than he had in a while. Iruka was trying to help him out, and here he was, throwing that help right back at his face. “I know—” the blonde murmured, studiously avoiding eye contact with Iruka.

“And you also understand that if this keeps up what will happen—”

“No!” Naruto shot out, eyes wide and focused back on Iruka. Fear clawed at him again but this time, a different sort of fear coupled with shame. It squirmed about his belly making him want to be sick. “Please, Iruka-sensei! I was just having a bad day yesterday. It was all that stupid jerk’s fault! And I swear, my teacher has something against me. He was there when the stupid bastard was goading me—”

“Language.”

“Right,” Naruto frowned, swallowed and proceeded. “Please, Iruka-sensei. My day was bad enough yesterday without having to see some counsellor who’d just want to talk about my _feelings_ or what I was _thinking_ ,” Naruto grumbled, then stared into Iruka’s dark eyes beseechingly. “And I don’t want Pa knowing,” he went on, gnawing his lower lip. “He’ll just... worry and he’ll pull me out of Konoha to be home schooled in whichever country he’s currently in. I don’t want that, not after everything else. Please, Iruka-sensei, I’ll do anything!”

The man sighed heavily, as though shifting an invisible burden about on his back. “Alright,” he relented, “but there is a gala this evening.”

“Meh, gala-smala,” Naruto dismissed with a wave of his hand. “What the hell does a gala have to do with me—oh,” he paused, azure eyes wide as he leaped back from Iruka and pointed at him. “Oh hell no! I’m not going to some stupid gala!”

サスケxナルト

“So much for not attending the gala,” Naruto muttered. Dejectedly, he tugged his tie loose and slipped it into the pocket of his black Armani blazer. It felt like it was almost strangling him to death. Or maybe it was just the thought of all the stuffy adults he was going to be surrounded by that had him feeling smothered.

“Hey, lighten up shorty.” One of the teen’s two companions commented breezily. “At least you’ve got me, yeah?”

Naruto immediately exploded.

“Who the hell are you calling shorty!” he growled, offended. It wasn’t his fault he inherited short genes from his parents and was... ever so slightly vertically challenged. Especially compared to the other blond. And it wasn’t by all _that_ much. Not really. “You’re not _that_ much bigger than I am, Deidera. And at least I look about my age unlike you, so there!”

Deidera’s one visible steel-gray eye flared like the fuse from one of his homemade bombs and his hair—as bright as Naruto’s own—seemed to bristled in the long ponytail that it was pulled up in. “I don’t know,” Deidera refuted. “If I didn’t know how old you were, I’d think you belonged in junior high, still!”

Naruto’s fingers clenched and formed into angry fists. “I would not, jerk!” He hissed, but doubt filled his mind. It wouldn’t be the first time his age had been mistaken. A pause and then, “Take that back!”

“ _Deidera-san_ ,” came the slightly lower and calmer voice of the third person in their trio. He looked young still, though nowhere near as youthful as Deidera and the bearing with which he carried himself told everyone around them that he wasn’t to be messed with. “You should know better.”

Deidera gave a sulky huff. “Yeah, yeah,” he muttered, though for some bizarre reason he looked pleased with himself. “Just because we’re on a job, Sasori-kun, doesn’t mean you have to be so uptight.”

“We’re here,” Sasori announced, ignoring the comment. Like he usually did.

Naruto felt dread settled in his stomach. Funny, he would liken it to the same sensation as swallowing a few bars of lead covered in spikes. Not that he’d ever done that before but the description seemed right.

The gala was being held in one of the hotels that belonged to the an old friend of Naruto’s father. Saying that the place was huge would be a complete and utter understatement. Huge didn’t quite cover the size. It was _enormous_. Naruto had always thought this and now wasn’t any different as he glanced about the scattered throng of people, dressed in expensive suits or flimsy silk gowns. The building was a vast cavern of silvers and chrome and different variations of grey and glass that blended seamlessly together. The design had always fascinated Naruto. Appearing as he’d always assumed things would look in the future. Or maybe off a set from Star trek or Star wars.

Naruto didn’t even have time to hand his invitation to the doorman.

“Here’s Naruto now!” Came a booming voice before a large and heavy hand was dropped unceremoniously onto his shoulder, causing him to stumble under the added weight. Then he was looking up and into the slightly worn, olive face of Jiraiya. The man had his snowy hair pulled back from his face in a tidy ponytail and looked highly uncomfortable in the formal attire he was wearing. Naruto was startled to find the elder male was minus the red makeup for once. Being the eccentric and kabuki fan that Jiraiya was, he was virtually never seen without it.

“Pervy-san,” Naruto greeted happily. He hadn’t known the old guy was going to be present. Maybe the gala wouldn’t be so bad after all.

Jiraiya coughed. “I told you he’d be here,” he was saying to the other handsome if hard faced man that Naruto failed to notice with Jiraiya earlier.

“Hey old man!” the blonde teen greeted the other. He was soundly clipped across the ear, courtesy of Jiraiya who looked more than a little embarrassed. “The hell was that for?” Naruto mumbled, rubbing his pained ear. It was ringing. That wasn’t good, right?

“Show a little more respect for your elders,” Jiraiya chastised, lowly. “Fugaku is an old acquaintance and friend of your father. Insulting him with such familiarity—”

But the other man, Fugaku interrupted by stepping closer to the teen and shaking his hand. “Naruto-kun,” he said. His face remained stony but his eyes held a slight warmth that wasn’t there earlier. “You are looking well and have not changed at all since I saw you last.”

Naruto grinned wry. “Nope,” he replied.

“I imagine you are finding the adjustment of being back in the country a little taxing. How has everyone been treating you?”

Briefly, Naruto’s mind flickered through every new friend he’d made since his return before souring a little on a few of the less ‘friendly’ individuals he’d encountered. “I’ve met a few jackasses I wouldn’t mind knocking a few teeth loose from,” he admitted.

“Nothing you can’t handle, Naruto,” Jiraiya said. “Can’t be too different from your brief stint in that American school. Although I think you’ll find there aren’t too many foreign students in your school.”

“I counted maybe eight…” Naruto agreed, ticking off his fingers. “Not including the old hag.”

Jiraiya turned a funny reddish-purple.

Fugaku nodded to Jiraiya. “If you would excuse us? I need to speak with him for a moment.”

This was new but Naruto said nothing as he was ushered away from Jiraiya who was probably as baffled as the teen looked. He peered back to see that his two body guards, Deidera and Sasori were loitering close by. Sasori surreptitiously scanning the faces of everyone and Deidera chattering a mile a minute to his partner.

“Your father has an interesting view in whom your companions should be,” Fugaku uttered, though he wasn’t looking at Deidera or Sasori when he spoke.

Naruto shrugged. “He just wanted to make sure I wasn’t alone, I guess.”

“He has made a very good choice in those two,” Fugaku added. “If I was not made aware of their occupation I would have thought them heirs to lesser businesses. The blonde has an interest in art and would probably keep even the most well-learned in art history intrigued and the red-head, he is from a very wealthy family. They will be here tonight, Naruto and will make excellent allies to your father if you play your cards right.”

 _Great_ , Naruto reflected glumly. He wasn’t really into this power play stuff. Wasn’t interested in the family business at all, really and here he was, getting advice for such a play now from Fugaku. Even if the advice was sound, Naruto didn’t have the mind for it.

“So how’s ‘Tachi?” he asked, trying to steer the conversation elsewhere.

“Why do you not ask him yourself?” Fugaku returned. This time, he actually sounded _pleased_. It was a strange event for Naruto. He’d very seldom heard the man being anything but cool and or speak with authority.

Naruto’s grin widened. “He’s here?” he asked, eyes flickering over the crowd of people with more interest. He hadn’t seen Itachi in several months. What with Itachi overseeing all the international dealings with the family business, Sharingan Corporation, he was constantly jetting about the world. Still, he probably saw Itachi more in a year than he’d ever seen Fugaku in his lifetime.

“Yes,” Fugaku conceded, his expression growing stern again. “He should be along any minute now. He is presently with my other son.”

“Ah,” Naruto murmured in understanding. From what he’d heard over the years—courtesy of Itachi himself—his little brother was something of a handful. Also wilful to the point of obstinate. Not exactly the model son, unlike Itachi who endeavoured so much to keep his parents happy. Naruto hadn’t met the little brother yet due to the fact the other boy was still in school so the blonde was eager to meet him now. Even if the boy was a little shit, Itachi was always talking about him and it made Naruto curious. “Baby brother acting out again?”

Fugaku snorted. “I blame the boy’s mother!”

“And once Mikoto-san decides something, there’s no dissuading her,” the blonde agreed, recalling Itachi’s mother. She was a lovely woman, much more open than Fugaku but also very headstrong and both Itachi and Fugaku obviously loved her dearly; she had both wrapped around her little finger. It was actually rather funny watching the interaction between them. “So,” Naruto added, “how old is the little guy then? He must be getting on now.”

At this, a funny expression flittered across Fugaku’s face. One Naruto only caught because of his interactions with Itachi.

“Chichi-ue,” came a deep voice from behind that Naruto was familiar with and the blonde turned with a wide grin. It swiftly vanished.

“‘Tachi,” he mumbled, hardly enthusiastic anymore. The tall, ponytailed male offered a small if baffled smile in return but Naruto’s gaze had flittered from him to the slightly shorter, glaring Itachi-lookalike.

There was a beat of silence and then;

“Wait. Wait. _This_ is the _baby_ brother you’re forever going on about?” Naruto exclaimed, disbelief colouring his tone. His eyes were back on Itachi, arms waving around wildly like a floundering swimmer as he demanded an answer. He’d been expecting a ten year-old, snot-nosed brat. _Not... Not **him**!_

Apparently, he wasn’t the only confused party.

“You mean, _this_ _loser_ is the charismatic blonde you kept talking about? The one I just had to meet?” Sasuke asked with a dark expression.

“Sasuke!” Fugaku reprimanded. “Naruto is the heir of Minato Namikaze and a good friend to our family.”

“So I’ve heard,” Sasuke responded, stiffly. His narrowed gaze was still very much fixed on the blonde teen.

 _Don’t kill him, don’t kill him, don’t kill him,_ Naruto chanted, inwardly. He was here on behalf of his father and his company. Murder wouldn’t look good no matter if the victom actually deserved it. He grit his teeth and forced a smile.

“Ah, I should have recognised you right off when I first ran into you,” Naruto decided to say, just to break the awkwardness. “You’re practically a clone of Itachi.”

Sasuke’s jaw clenched. _Ha! Take that, dickwad_.

Itachi’s brow rose and Naruto all but twitched on the spot. No, he was not going to repeat their first meeting. Definitely not in front of Fugaku, although he may share it with Itachi one day. Maybe.

He shot the baby Uchiha a look, just _daring_ him to say something.

Naruto decided, the gods thoroughly enjoyed messing with him terribly because Sasuke read the challenge and accepted it without batting an eye.

“He walked out on a busy road and I almost ran him down,” he informed his family, not glancing away from the Uzumaki and Naruto could practically feel the smugness that exuded from his body. Like heat from the sun.

Face flooding with warmth, Naruto’s eyes slid sideways, to Itachi. “I was running late again,” he elaborated, silently pleading for _him_ to understand the situation.

“And not paying attention to your surroundings,” Sasuke added, earning him Naruto’s attention once more.

“Hey, I managed to get a ride to school out of you, didn’t I?” Naruto ground his teeth around the words. “Even if you were completely uptight about it. I actually got the school on time for once.”

Fugaku and Itachi were quiet for a moment, both staring at Sasuke like he’d grown another head and several spare limbs. Naruto swore the older teen went incredibly stiff, dark eyes unbelievably wary. Almost as if he expected to be attacked any moment.

“Interesting,” Itachi murmured, his gaze contemplative.

The Uzumaki wanted away from the environment before things exploded or _he_ got attacked. Sasuke looked about ready to beat his head in. At least, that was Naruto’s interpretation of his next glance. Not that he was scared or anything. No, that wasn’t it. He just didn’t want to beat the daylights out of Fugaku’s youngest son while the man was standing right there. Yeah.

“Anyway, I had best run off and mingle or whatever,” Naruto nodded to himself, flashed a quick smile at the two elder Uchihas—ignored Sasuke—and ran off in the opposite direction.

サスケxナルト

Naruto always considered himself to be a social butterfly.

He flitted about the room, garnering interest without having so much as to break a sweat and soon, managed to earn a fair amount of queries about possible deals between his father’s business and other companies. None had approached him in regards to a merger, yet or anything remotely similar—most companies being far too small—for which he was impossibly glad.

He had very little idea as to what he would do in that situation besides contacting his father with the details. Business just wasn’t his thing. All he was good at was drawing attention to his father.

It was after one such bout of talking endlessly that he wandered outside to the patio for fresh air. It was practically deserted, only a few other people lingering close to the stainless steel and glass double doors. He smiled at them as he passed and received a few friendly nods in return.

Ahhh life was good.

“Here you are, Naruto,” Itachi said, appearing in the doorway. He slowly made his way over to where the blonde stood, next to the near chest height railing. He added nothing more as he settled, apparently just outside to enjoy the gradually chilling air and vanishing sunlight.

Maybe Naruto had spoken too soon. Sasuke was following his brother.

“Escaping the massive horde of fans?” Naruto grinned, ignoring the younger Uchiha to the best of his ability.

Itachi shook his head, as though dispelling a thought. “Something like that.

“You have been doing remarkably well, after what I managed to gathered from some of the guests,” he added. “Many were impressed. Your father will be proud, I’m sure.”

Naruto waived the praise away, uncomfortable with it. “I’m sure he will.”

“Hn.”

The blonde ignored the grunt emitted from Sasuke. _Tried_ to ignore the grunt emitted from Sasuke but found it hard when he could feel the other’s stare on the side of his face. He ground his teeth and tried to count to ten to centre himself.

_1... 2... 3..._

“Would you stop staring at me!”

Ah, hell. He’d never been particularly patient, anyway. Or that great with controlling his temper. He supposed he should have been relatively pleased he was at least outside and the few other people that were out there with him weren’t in hearing distance. Unless he yelled.

Glaring azure eyes adhered to Sasuke, who gazed back evenly. “I’m not staring at you.”

“Sasuke,” Itachi warned. It was ignored.

“Oh, my mistake to think that your eyes on my face _isn’t_ staring,” Naruto countered, his stance automatically falling into one for a fight.

“Why would I stare at you?” Sasuke scoffed, dark brow arched. It looked perfectly haughty and filled the blonde with the inexplicable desire to smash the expression off his stupid, pale face.

Naruto shrugged. “I don’t know,” he volleyed. “You tell me.”

“Sasuke, that’s enough.”

“Tch,” Sasuke looked away, brow wrinkled and face sour. “Why are we out here talking to this loser, again?”

“I’m not a loser, you jerk!” Naruto all but hollered, then clamped a hand over his mouth as his eyes darted around. Oh good, everyone else was gone now. No need to censor himself too much. “By the way, that face you’re pulling makes you look constipated.”

In return, Sasuke growled. Like actually _growled_. It sounded positively feral and Naruto inched slightly back before thrusting a finger in the boy’s face.

“Don’t you growl at me, bastard! What the hell do you think you are, a dog?”

“You can talk,” Sasuke countered, his eyes narrowed into obsidian daggers, “with those damn marks on your face, you look just like a fox!”

“— _just like a fox,”_ a voice whispered from his memories. _“You’ll be my adorable little fox, right? Naru-chan.”_

He jerked back, eyes impossibly wide. “Wha—what? I—don’t—” Abruptly unable to breathe, let alone form an intelligent sentence, Naruto stumbled backward into the railing. It bit into his spine but he barely felt it. His hands clenched into fists at his sides. _Get a grip!_ He ordered himself, struggling against the sudden and vicious onslaught.

He failed to see the brief look of confusion that flickered across Sasuke’s features or the concern from Itachi. All he saw was red. Red flowing over ivory.

By the time he’d surfaced enough from his thoughts, it was to hear the tail end of Sasuke being reprimanded by his brother. At another time, this may have incited him to gloat but not this time. All he wanted to do now was leave. Head to the only place where nothing could hurt him. Not petty pricks like Sasuke or his memories.

“You have no right to call me that,” Naruto snapped harshly, breathing tight and if anyone were to describe him at that very moment, it would be to say he resembled a cornered fox. Teeth bared slightly and shoulders curled up around his neck to make his stature seem more solid than it was. “Only _friends_ can use that nickname.

“It was great seeing you again, ‘Tachi,” he managed to force out, focus diverted to his friend once more. He offered a shaky grin. “But I think I’ll be going now.”

“Nonsense,” Itachi intervened, his hand firmly on the blonde’s shoulder. If he noticed how it trembled, he said nothing of it. “There are still many that wish to meet the elusive son of Minato.”

Rubbing the back of his neck uncomfortably, Naruto kept his gaze locked on Itachi’s chest. It was surprisingly thinner than Sasuke’s. _Just say your bit and leave, Naruto,_ he encouraged himself. _Just say it and go. Iruka-sensei never said anything about how long you had to stay, just that you had to come here._ “If it’s all the same to you, I’m actually not feeling all that great right now,” he confessed, “The only reason I’m here is because I thought I should at least make an appearance. So if you don’t mind—” he looked up, waving over his bodyguards. They had already been making their way over.

Relieved he wouldn’t need to hunt the pair down, Naruto made his way toward him.

“Sir?” Sasori queried, ever the professional. Deidera on the other hand, not so much.

“Is there a problem, Naruto-kun?” the taller blonde asked while glaring over at Sasuke. It was the angriest Naruto had ever seen him, which was saying something as the young man was generally as happy-go-lucky as the Uzumaki himself. “Do you need me to blow something up?”

And as much as Naruto really hated Sasuke right now...

“No. I was just leaving. Let’s go.”

Sasuke couldn’t have known the potential bomb he’d be setting off with his insult.

“You looked happy until that snotty little brat came along,” Deidera continued, even as he followed Naruto’s hasty retreat. “What did he say to you? Are you sure you don’t want me blowing his arse up? Not even a little?”

“I doubt Itachi-kun would appreciate that very much,” Naruto replied, slipping around a large group of chattering women. A couple whom eyed him and his companions a tad bit too long for his liking.

“And let’s not forget Uchiha senior,” Sasori added diplomatically, apparently immune to the lingering glances cast his way.

Deidera snorted and shot one such woman an overly bright smile. So much for being professionals.

“Naruto-kun.” The trio stopped and glanced at the new comer to find Itachi had been following them, a troubled frown marring his expression. Silent as shadows, Sasori and Deidera melted into the background leaving the pair—for the most part—alone. “I am sorry for the way Sasuke-kun behaved toward you.”

“I hate your brother,” the Uzumaki announced. “And I think it’s safe to assume that he feels the same way about me.”

“Perhaps,” Itachi replied noncommittally and slipped his hands into his coat pockets. “But even I was disappointed with his behaviour,” he peered over at Naruto, dark eyes serious. “I will not make excuses for him but you must know he did not know the full impact of what he was saying when he mentioned the marks on your face.”

Naruto shrugged easily. “I figured as much.” He tried to run a hand through his hair but was surprised that the gel still held firm. He dropped his hand and stared at it. “Doesn’t make me want to kick the shit out of him any less. I don’t think you’d appreciate that much, though. I doubt your parents would, either.”

“Perhaps,” the Uchiha murmured again as he pulled a set of car keys from his pocket.

Naruto blinked then grinned cheekily. Warmth gradually returning to his chilled body. “Are you giving me the go ahead?”

Itachi gave him a look and spun the keys around a long, thin finger. “I never said anything of the sort.”

“You rock!” Naruto exploded, happily and launched himself at the young man ignorant to all the people watching their interaction. “You are such an awesome big brother. I wish you were mine. Sasuke doesn’t deserve you.”

The Uchiha simply shook his head and motioned for him to follow. Which Naruto did. “You were headed to Ichiraku ramen, weren’t you?” Itachi queried.

Naruto’s mouth fell open and he tripped. “How’d you—”

“Humans are a creature of habit. You in particular,” Itachi informed him simply, already taking the stairs down the front of the building in long powerful strides. Naruto was forced to hurry in order to reach him. “And Ichiraku has the best ramen in the area.”

The blonde paused, golden brows drawn down in confusion. “Are you calling me predictable?” He shook his head, deciding that wasn’t the question he wanted answered. “What about the—”

“Gala? Chichi-ue will survive without me for a few hours,” Itachi smirked. “It’ll also prepare Sasuke for the real world a little more, I should think.”

And the Uzumaki smirked along with him, knowing what Itachi really meant; that Sasuke couldn’t hide behind him and would need to meet and mingle. Being the huge antisocial being that he was—at least by observation and the odd comment from Itachi over the years—this would drive him crazy. Naruto couldn’t wait.

サスケxナルト

Several hours later and Naruto was absolutely _stuffed_.

Now he thought he had a closer idea as to how a bear felt after gorging itself on food before hibernation. All he wanted to do was sleep. But he had a gala to attend to. It was the least he could do after Itachi was kind enough to foot the bill—not that he was broke or anything—and he’d forgotten why he’d wanted to leave the gala to begin with.

“Itachi!”

Oh. _That’s_ why.

The pair—with Naruto’s body guards still lingering in the background—had barely made it back inside the hotel when they heard Sasuke’s angry voice. He looked every bit as irate, too. Actually, it sort of reminded the blonde of their first meeting... when he’d nearly been killed. His hair stilled looked silly as hell. Much sharper, somehow in the back though. Almost as if instead of hair he wore a set of ebony spikes. It was sort of...

 _Impressive._ Then Naruto felt like smacking himself at the compliment.

The youngest Uchiha paused a moment when he spotted Naruto at Itachi’s side before he stalked over, rubbing at something on his cheek with a napkin. It looked a lot like lipstick. This only caused Itachi to chuckle and Sasuke to scowl harder. Instead of the mark coming off, as Naruto was certain had been Sasuke’s intention, it smeared across the teen’s pallid cheek; staining it a shocking fuchsia.

Naruto snickered quietly to himself. Sasuke looked almost like one of those freaking circus clowns. An exceedingly angry and glaring circus clown. He abruptly stopped snickering. That was actually damn scary.

“I hate you,” Sasuke muttered—the comment assumedly aimed at his brother, since it _was_ said brother at whom his glare was fixed—finally giving up on his face. “Where have you been?”

“Where we were is none of your concern,” Itachi responded, whatever he said next was missed by Naruto as the blonde swept by Sasuke without further acknowledgement and accidentally into someone else. And by the way everyone was reacting to his collision, a very _important_ someone.

 _Oh shit!_ He cursed. _Oh shit, ohshitohshitohshit..._

Glaring jade-green eyes. Pale complexion. Crimson hair—

“Gaara?” Naruto blinked to be sure, then convinced he wasn’t seeing some kind of phantasm beamed and forgetting exactly why he had never touched the other before. But really, he was just too happy to see a familiar face and not some uptight CEO or something. “Gaara! It’s you. Oh, for a second there I was scared that I hit someone really—” he paused, head tilted quizzically to the side as he noticed the huge gap around them that had, moments before, been filled with people. People that were now, forming a makeshift ring of bodies.

_What the hell?_

“Say, Gaara,” he began, eyeing the people around him. No one in their area was saying a thing. Just _staring_. “Why are they looking at us like that?”

“Get off me.”

The blonde quickly scrambled off, his face flooding with heat in his embarrassment. “Oh right,” he chuckled nervously, wondering whether he was about to be reunited with his ancestors. But Gaara didn’t seem _that_ angry. At least, nowhere near as irate as he had been in the cafeteria. “Sorry. Sometimes I forget that people don’t like being touched and all. I was always told that I’m an extremely tactile person by nature and that I’m loud and don’t really think before I—”

“Our apologies, Sabaku-san” Itachi intervened, subtly stepping a little in front of the babbling blonde after catching up with him. Naruto couldn’t help it, he felt relief flood him. Maybe he would live to see another day.

Gaara just stared at the Uchiha, not even bothering to right his clothing. Then turned that stare on Naruto, who shifted restlessly; certain that all the hard work he’d put into getting the red-head to talk to him a little had all just gone down the toilet.

_And Friday hadn’t been so bad..._

“Naruto,” Itachi murmured, severing his train of thought before it completely left the station. “This is Gaara Sabaku. The CEO of Kazekage industries. Sabaku-san this is—”

_CEO? CEO!_

“HOLY SHIT!” Naruto gasped, stunned. He blinked at the other boy. They were in the same class so he deduced about the same age and—”Gaara, you’re a CEO? Wow that’s some accomplishment!” he enthused. He couldn’t see himself in that kind of position even in his twenties let alone as a sixteen year-old. “How do you manage balancing school and junk? I mean, I’m having trouble with the homework they demand of me let alone anything as serious as looking after an entire business like Kazekage Industries.”

The awe couldn’t be kept from his voice and Itachi glanced between the pair before coming to some conclusion Naruto couldn’t see. He stepped aside, apparently satisfied with the situation.

“Please excuse me, Sabaku-san,” the Uchiha requested with a polite bow. “I have things that must be seen to elsewhere.” He paused then, to speak with the blonde. “Naruto-kun, I will speak with you again later.”

Grinning, Naruto happily waved him away. “You better!” he demanded. “You still have a few things to explain.”

With only the faintest upward curl of his lips, Itachi nodded at the blonde before swiftly being swallowed up into the crowd.

“I guess that explains why you’re here, right, Gaara?” Naruto hastily asked to fill the silence. It appeared that the redhead was content with just staring at him and not offering up anything on his own and if Naruto was good at anything, it was filling those awkward silences. One might say that he was a professional. “Me? I got blackmailed into coming here. My father couldn’t make it, see? And well I’m not really into this business um... _stuff_. Maybe you’ve heard of his company? Hokage—”

“Minato Namikaze,” Gaara stated, the expression in his eyes altering ever so slightly. Still, he mostly looked really very angry. “You are his son.”

Unsure whether the red-head thought this good or bad, Naruto grinned. Pleasantly surprised that Gaara had heard of his father. “Yup. That’s my Pa!”

“And Kushina Uzumaki was your mother.”

Naruto’s grin wavered but didn’t quite die. To say he adored his mother would be an understatement. In his mind, there was no mother on earth that could best her in anything. Still, he felt remarkably wary of anyone bringing her up unless he knew them well enough. “Yes,” he agreed.

Gaara simply continued his observation a few moments more before he turned away, forcing the crowd that had been eavesdropping to hurriedly jump back. He began striding away, his steps clipped and ferocious. Not quite unlike that of a caged animal ready to tear anything that bled red apart.

“You are here on your father’s behalf.” Again a statement.

 _Where are we goin—_ “Um yeah...” he replied slowly, still diligently trailing behind his classmate in mild confusion and taking note of the fact they were steadily moving _away_ from everyone else. “That’s pretty much it.”

“Kazekage Industries have long been rivals with Hokage Corp... What makes you think we’d suddenly be interested in forming a partnership?”

 _Okay. What?_ Naruto blinked, utterly baffled. _When did I ever mention anything to do with—oh._ “You’ve been talking to Fugaku-san?”

Gaara didn’t answer. “Are you telling me this _wasn’t_ your intention?”

Was it normal feeling so totally out of your depth? Well that was how it felt to Naruto. That and like he was flanked on all sides by an invisible enemy and one wrong move meant his demise. Shogi was a game he’d never been particularly good at. Nor chess for that matter.

Naruto swallowed and tried not to squirm. “Uh... honestly—”

“Sabaku,” Sasuke abruptly greeted, interrupting the pair and things went silent.

The Sabaku and Uchiha glared at each other and Naruto was startled at the level of animosity generating between them. Sure, Gaara hadn’t been particularly friendly toward him but conversely, nor had Naruto been smothered by the boy’s obvious intent to murder him viciously, either. Even if Gaara was only a little taller than Naruto and subsequently, still much shorter than Sasuke, the blonde inwardly noted he cut a fierce silhouette.

Likewise, Sasuke seemed far angrier than Naruto had ever seen him. Including the brief stint where he was certain the Uchiha was orchestrating his murder on their awkward and near silent drive to school.

Then inky black eyes slid toward Naruto, his expression almost seemed questioning. Which was plain weird. “Uzumaki.”

Naruto’s fists clenched again and he gritted his teeth at the lack of honorific. If the jerk wanted to have another go, this time the blonde refused to run away without kicking him first. Who cared if there was a crowd? There weren’t _that_ many people in their little corner. Sasuke would deserve it and hey, Itachi had more or less agreed.

“Can’t you see you’re not welcome here, _Uchiha_.”

The blonde turned to see it was Gaara that had spoken and found himself yet again surprised. Not just at the open animosity but the act that the boy had awesome timing. Apparently Gaara hadn’t been too pleased at the lack of honorific attached to his own surname, either. Then again, it could just be his general dislike of Sasuke altogether.

“Uzumaki-san and I were about to discuss business.”

Sasuke looked between them, sceptical and crossed his arms, brow hiked in a gesture of patent disbelief. “I doubt that,” he said then looked at Naruto. “Moron, I need to speak with you.”

 _Moron?_ Did Sasuke just call him a Moron? _Oh hell no!_ “You take that back, bastard!”

“Well you are an idiot, aren’t you?”

“Says the prize prick of the lot!”

Sasuke took a step closer, a glare fitted on his face once more. Strange, it seemed a near permanent fixture wherever Naruto was concerned. “Watch what you call me, dead last.”

Naruto also took a step forward, baring his teeth. “Or what, dickwad?”

“Retard.”

“Arsehole.”

“Imbecile.”

“Douchebag.”

“Loser.”

“Shut the fuck up!” Naruto growled, finger jabbing at the Uchiha accusingly. “You up tight, pale-faced sissy boy with a ten foot pole shoved so far up your arse you can’t even communicate properly without resorting to caveman grunts! And-and you have _really_ fucked up hair!”

After that explosion, the blonde felt almost childish and tried to calm his breathing but being around Sasuke... He couldn’t believe how easy just being in the senior’s vicinity set him off. He was pleasantly surprised he _hadn’t_ already tried to attack the bigger boy.

For his part, the Uchiha just gazed back at him still glaring, though there was something off about the whole thing. Naruto’s eyes narrowed, wondering what he was missing.

“Did it take you very long to come up with that?” Sasuke drawled a slow, superior smirk crawling across his face.

 _Grrrr!_ So Naruto had, what of it?

Faster than the eye could blink, Naruto whipped the tie from his pocket and had it wrapped around both his hands, intent on using it to strangle the blasted Uchiha. Wherever his mother was, he was certain she’d understand his sudden murderous urge. She had one hell of a temper on her, too. In all likelihood she’d have cheered him on.

_So much for **not** attacking the bastard Uchiha..._

Divine intervention came in the form of Sasori who swept in and stole the tie before Naruto could go through with his plans of murder. “Sir,” he said, nodding toward where Gaara stood silently watching the proceedings.

_Oh. Oh Shit._

“Er,” Naruto mumbled, grinning awkwardly at his classmate, choosing to ignore the Uchiha altogether. “He just has a—well he just pisses me off. I understand if you don’t—”

“We’ll talk somewhere you won’t be distracted,” Gaara cut in simply in that strangely low voice of his. “I’ll contact you. We can talk then.” Turning, he nodded at a pair Naruto hadn’t noticed earlier. One was a fairly tall, young women with dirty-blonde hair pulled into four ponytails and the other a rather heavily build, brown-haired young man.

The newcomers scrutinised Naruto before quietly following behind Gaara as he moved through the crowd.

“Hn.”

The noise drew Naruto’s attention back to the unwanted Uchiha standing far too close for his liking. What was he still even doing there? Gaara had wandered off already and as he’d stated, Sasuke wasn’t welcome.

A petite, brown haired girl blocked his line of vision and pressed a silver tray beneath his nose with a glittering smile.

“Canapé?”

Diverted for the moment, Naruto eagerly accepted the offering. Several bowls of ramen or not, they looked _delicious_! Then took a second and third before offering a grin and taking a bite. It was better than it looked. The glossy smoked salmon was seasoned just right and moist on his tongue. The taste brought out by the mild spice just beneath it and finished nicely by the savoury base and creamy topping.

“Mmm,” he murmured appreciatively around his mouthful. Crème fraiche dribbling from the corner of his mouth. All the manners in the world wouldn’t prevent him from being a messy eater. Even after all the etiquette lessons in dining—all the horrible tutors—his mannerisms were still comparable to that of a dog. “Thanks!”

The server smiled but Naruto was more focused on the remaining two canapés in his hand than anything else. And maybe finding Itachi again or Jiraiya. The latter was bound to be around somewhere. Probably somewhere with women who had the biggest boobs or the least clothing...

Hmmm. He swiped at his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Here,” Sasori sighed, pressing a napkin to Naruto’s face. More importantly, the food still leaking from the blonde’s mouth.

“Eh… thanks.”

“Soooo, Naruto—”

Sasori endeavoured to freeze the elder blonde’s tongue with a look. “ _Deidera_...”

The taller blonde wilted, a bit, under the red-head man’s steely eyed stare, then drew himself up. “And another one to add to the growing list of admirers.”

Naruto was confused. “Huh?”

“I don’t think Kurama-san will be happy.”

Both Sasori and Naruto were gazing at Deidera now. The former in exasperation and the latter still in utter perplexity.

Naruto’s brows furrowed. “Kurama? Ahhh, I’m sure he’ll—”

“Be supremely annoyed,” the taller blonde finished, succinctly. His eyes had narrowed and his smile was sort of twisted looking. “You know how much you mean to him. When he’s around, Sasori and I aren’t even needed. What would he say to find out _his_ precious Naru-chan was being bothered?” Here, Deidera lowered his voice a little. Which really, didn’t change a lot. “Or that you vanished off with _Itachi_ for so many hours...”

“ _Deidera_.”

“What? You know what Kurama’s like.”

“Be that as it may,” Sasori spoke, tone bland. “It isn’t our place to say anything. Remember your station.”

The Uzumaki winced. Kurama _was_ prone to severe bouts of over protectiveness. But it wasn’t like Naruto was really being harassed by anyone excluding, perhaps, Sasuke. That, on the other hand, was different and he refused to go running to Kurama for something as petty as that.

There was an odd sound.

Naruto’s head snapped around only to find Sasuke still standing _right **there**_. The Uzumaki wasn’t sure what to make of his expression but the strangely contemplative gleam in his eye was downright unsettling. Then again, he had just heard a whole lot of—

 _Oh_... The Uzumaki vowed he was going to kill Deidera. Gut him and burn the remains. He hadn’t even noticed the stupid bastard was still with them.

“Should have known,” the Uchiha muttered. Or at least, that’s what the Uzumaki _thought_ he’d said. Then his lips curled into that damned smirk Naruto was now horribly familiar with and the Namikaze heir felt a chill trickle down his spine as Sasuke added, “You’re gay.”


End file.
